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D. Pedro. She cannot endure to hear tell of a the renowned Claudio (whose estimation do you husband.
mightily hold up) to a contaminated person, such a Leon. O, by no means ; she mocks all her wooers one as Hero. out of suit.
D. John. What proof shall I make of that? D. Pedro. She were an excellent wife for Be- Bora. Proof enough to misuse the prince, to vex nedick.
Claudio, to undo Hero, and kill Leonato : Look Leon. O, my lord, if they were but a week mar- you for any other issue ? ried, they would talk themselves mad.
D. John. Only to despite them, I will endeavour D. Pedro. Count Claudio, when mean you to go any thing. to church?
Bora. Go then, find me a meet hour to draw don Claud. To-morrow, my lord: Time goes on Pedro and the count Claudio, alone: tell them, crutches, till love have all his rites.
that you know that Hero loves me ; intend 6 a kind Leon. Not till Monday, my dear son, which is of zeal both to the prince and Claudio, as — in love hence a just seven-night; and a time too brief too, of your brother's honour who hath made this match; to have all things answer my mind.
and his friend's reputation, who is thus like to be D. Pedro. Come, you shake the head at so long cozened with the semblance of a maid, -- that you a breathing; but, I warrant thee, Claudio, the time have discovered thus. They will scarcely believe shall not go dully by us; I will, in the interim, this without trial : offer them instances; which shall undertake one of Hercules' labours; which is, to bear no less likelihood, than to see me at her chambring signior Benedick and the lady Beatrice into ber-window; hear me call Margaret, Hero ; hear a mountain of affection, the one with the other. I Margaret term me Borachio ; and bring them to would fain have it a match; and I doubt not but see this, the very night before the intended wedto fashion it, if you three will but minister such as- ding : for, in the mean time, I will so fashion the sistance as I shall give you direction.
matter, that Hero shall be absent; and there shall Leon. My lord, I am for you, though it cost me appear such seeming truth of Hero's disloyalty, that ten nights' watchings.
jealousy shall be call'd assurance, and all the preClaud. And I, my lord.
paration overthrown. D. Pedro. And you too, gentle Hero?
D. John. Grow this to what adverse issue it can, Hero. I will do any modest office, my lord, to I will put it in practice: Be cunning in the workhelp my cousin to a good husband.
ing this, and thy fee is a thousand ducats. D. Pedro. And Benedick is not the unhopefullest Bora. Be you constant in the accusation, and my husband that I know : thus far can I praise him; cunning shall not shame me. he is of a noble strain 4, of approved valour, and D. John. I will presently go learn their day of confirmed honesty. I will teach you how to humour marriage.
[Exeunt. your cousin, that she shall fall in love with Benedick : -- and I, with your two helps, will so practise SCENE III. Leonato's Garden. on Benedick, that, in despite of his quick wit and
Enter BENEDICK and a Boy. his queasy 5 stomach, he shall fall in love with Beatrice. If we can do this, Cupid is no longer an
Bene. Boy,— archer ; his glory shall be ours, for we are the only
Boy. Signior. love-gods. Go in with me, and I will tell you my it hither to me in the orchard.
Bene. In my chamber-window lies a book; bring drift.
Boy. I am here already, sir. SCENE II. – Another Room in Leonato's House.
Bene. I know that ; – but I would have thee
hence, and here again. (Erit Boy.]—I do much Enter Don John and BORACHIO.
wonder, that one man, seeing how much another D. John. It is so; the count Claudio shall marry man is a fool when he dedicates his behaviours to the daughter of Leonato.
love, will, after he hath laughed at such shallow Bora. Yea, my lord; but I can cross it. follies in others, become the argument of his own D. John. Any bar, any cross, any impediment scorn by falling in love : And such a man is Clauwill be medicinable to me: I am sick in displeasure dio. I have known, when there was no musick to him; and whatsoever comes athwart his affection, with him but the drum and fife; and now had he ranges evenly with mine. How canst thou cross rather hear the tabor and the pipe : I have known, this marriage ?
when he would have walked ten mile afoot, to see Bora. Not honestly, my lord; but so covertly a good armour; and now will he lie ten nights that no dishonesty shall appear in me.
awake carving the fashion of a new doublet. He D. John. Show me briefly how.
was wont to speak plain, and to the purpose, like an Bora. I think, I told your lordship, a year since, honest man, and a soldier; and now is he turn'd how much I am in the favour of Margaret, the orthographer; his words are a very fantastical banwaiting-gentlewoman to Hero.
quet, just so many strange dishes. May I be so D. John. I remember.
converted, and see with these eyes ? I cannot tell; Bora. I can, at any unseasonable instant of the I think not: I will not be sworn, but love may night, appoint her to look out at her lady's chamber- transform me to an oyster ; but I'll take my oath window.
on it, till he have made an oyster of me, he shall D. John. What life is in that, to be the death of never make me such a fool. One woman is fair; this marriage ?
yet I am well : another is wise; yet I am well: Bora. The poison of that lies in you to temper. another virtuous; yet I am well : but till all graces Go you to the prince your brother ; spare not to tell be in one woman, one woman shall not come in my him, that he hath wronged his honour in marrying grace. Rich she shall be, that's certain ; wise, or * Lineage. 5 Fastidious.
I'll none; virtuous, or I'll never cheapen her; fair, D. Pedro. Yea, marry; [T. CLAUDIO.] - Dost or I'll never look on her ; mild, or come not near; thou hear, Balthazar? I pray thee, get us some exnoble, or not I for an angel ; of good discourse, an cellent musick ; for to-morrow night we would have excellent musician, and her hair shall be of what it at the lady Hero's chamber-window. colour it pleases. Ha! the prince and monsieur Balth. The best I can, my lord. love! I will hide me in the arbour. [Withdraws. D. Pedro. Do so: farewell. [Ereunt BALTHAZAR
and musick.] Come hither, Leonato : What was it Enter Don Pedro, LEONATO, and Claudio.
you told me of to-day? that your niece Beatrice D. Pedro. Come, shall we hear this musick ? was in love with signior Benedick ? Claud. Yea, my good lord : – How still the
Claud. O, ay;
- Stalk on, stalk on; the fowl evening is,
sits. [ Aside to Pedro.] I did never think that As hush'd on purpose to grace harmony !
lady would have loved any man. D. Pedro. See you where Benedick hath hid him- Lron. No, nor I neither ; but most wonderful, self?
that she should so dote on signior Benedick, whom Claud. 0, very well, my lord : the musick ended, she hath in all outward behaviours seemed ever to We'll fit the kid-fox with a penny-worth.
Bene. Is't possible? Sits the wind in that corner ? Enter BalthAZAR with musick.
(Aside. D. Pedro. Come, Balthazar, we'll hear that song Leon. By my trotal, my lord, I cannot tell what to again.
think of it; but that she loves him with an enraged Balth. O good my lord, tax not so bad a voice affection, — it is past the infinite of thought. To slander musick any more than once.
D. Pedro. May be, she doth but counterfeit. D. Pedro. It is the witness still of excellency,
Claud. 'Faith, like enough. To put a strange face on his own perfection :
Leun. Counterfeit! There never was counterfeit I pray thee, sing, and let me woo no more. of passion came so near the life of passion, as she Balth. Because you talk of wooing, I will sing :
discovers it. Since many a wooer doth commence his suit
D. Pedro. Why, what effects of passion shows she? To her he thinks not worthy; yet he wooes;
Claud. Bait the hook well; this fish will bite. Yet will he swear, he loves.
[ Aside. D. Pedro. Nay, pray thee, come :
Leon. What effects, my lord! She will sit you Or, if thou wilt hold longer argument,
You heard my daughter tell you how.
Claud. She did, indeed.
D. Pedro. How, how, I pray you? You amaze
Leon. I would have sworn it had, my lord; esNote, notes, forsooth, and noting! [Musick. pecially against Benedick.
Bene. Now, Divine air! now is his soul ravish'd ! Bene. [Aside.) I should think this a gull, but - Is it not strange, that sheep's guts should hale that the white-bearded fellow speaks it: knavery souls out of men's bodies ? Well, a horn for my cannot, sure, hide itself in such reverence. money, when all's done.
Claud. He hath ta'en the infection ; hold it up.
[Aside. BALTHAZAR sings.
D. Pedro. Hath she made her affection known 1.
to Benedick? Balty. Sigh no more, ladies, sigh no more,
Leon. No; and swears she never will : that's her Men were deceivers ever ;
torment. One foot in sea, and one on shore ;
Claud. 'Tis true, indeed; so your daughter says: To one thing constant never :
Shall I, says she, that have so oft encounter'd him Then sigh not so,
with scorn, write to him that I love him? But let them go,
Leon. This says she now when she is beginning And be you blithe and bonny:
to write to him: for she'll be up twenty times a Converting all your sounds of woe
night; and there will she sit till she have writ a Into, Hey nonny, nonny.
sheet of paper :
– my daughter tells us all. Then II.
will she tear the letter into a thousand half-pence; Sing no more ditties, sing no mo7
rail at herself, that she should write to one that she Of dumps so dull and heary ;
knew would flout her : I measure him, says she, by The fraud of men was ever so,
my own spirit; for I should flout him, if he writ lo Since summer first was leavy.
me; yea, though I love him, I should. Then sigh not so, fc.
Claud. Then down upon her knees she falls,
weeps, sobs, beats her heart, tears her hair, and D. Pedro. By my troth, a good song.
cries, O sweel Benedick ! Balth. And an ill singer, my lord.
Leon. She doth, indeed; my daughter says so: D. Pedro. Ha ? no; no, faith; thou singest well and the ecstasy hath so much overborne her, that enough for a shift.
my daughter is sometime afraid she will do a desRene. [Aside.) An he had been a dog, that perate outrage to herself: It is very true, should have howled thus, they would have hanged
D. Pedro. It were good, that Benedick knew of him; and, I pray heaven, his bad voice bode no it by some other, if she will not discover it. mischief! I had as lief have heard the night-raven, Claud. To what end? He would but make a come what plague could have come after it. sport of it, and torment the poor lady worse. 7 More.
D. Pedro. An he should, it were an alms to hang
him : She's an excellent sweet lady; and, out of all matter ; that's the scene that I would see, which suspicion, she is virtuous.
will be merely a dumb show. Let us send her to Claud. And she is exceeding wise.
call him in to dinner.
[Aside. D. Pedro. In every thing, but in loving Benedick. [Exeunt Don PEDRO, CLAUDIO, and LEONATO.
Leon. I am sorry for her, as I have just cause, being her uncle and her guardian.
BENEDICK advances from the Arbour. D. Pedro. I would she had bestowed this dotage Bene. This can be no trick : The conference was on me; I would have daffd 8 all other respects, sadly borne.-— They have the truth of this from and made her half myself: I pray you, tell Benedick Hero. They seem to pity the lady; it seems, her of it, and tear what he will say.
affections have their full bent. Love me! why, it Leon. Were it good, think you ?
must be requited. I hear how I am censured: they Claud. Hero thinks surely, she will die : for she say, I will bear myself proudly, if I perceive the says, she will die if he love her not; and she will love come from her; they say too, that she will radie ere she makes her love known; and she will die ther die than give any sign of affection. - I did if he woo her, rather than she will bate one breath never think to marry : – I must not seem proud : of her accustomed crossness.
Happy are they that hear their detractions, and D. Pedro, She doth well : if she should make can put them to mending. They say, the lady is tender of her love, 'tis very possible he'll scorn it; fair ; 'tis a truth I can bear them witness : and virfor the man, as you know all, hath a contemptuous tuous; 'tis I cannot reprove it ; and wise, but spirit.
for leving me: - By my troth, it is no addition to Claud. He is a very proper man.
her wit; - nor no great argument of her folly, for D. Pedro. He hath indeed a good outward hap- I will be horribly in love with her. — I may chance piness.
have some odd quirks and remnants of wit broken Claud. And in my mind, very wise.
on me, because I have railed so long against marD. Pedro. He doth, indeed, show some sparks riage :- But doth not the appetite alter? A man that are like wit.
loves the meat in his youth, that he cannot endure Leon. And I take him to be valiant.
in his age: Shall quips, and sentences, and these D. Pedro. As Hector, I assure you: and in the paper bullets of the brain, awe a man from the managing of quarrels you may say he is wise ; for career of his humour ? No: The world must be either he avoids them with great discretion, or un- peopled. When I said, I would die a bachelor, I dertakes them with a most Christian-like fear. did not think I should live till I were married.
Leon. If he do fear God, he must necessarily keep Here comes Beatrice : By this day, she's a fair lady: peace; if he break the peace, he ought to enter into I do spy some marks of love in her. * quarrel with fear and trembling. D. Pedro. And so will he do; for the man doth
Enter BEATRICE. fear God. Well, I am sorry for your niece : Shall Beat. Against my will, I am sent to bid you come we go see Benedick, and tell him of her love ? in to dinner.
Claud. Never tell him, my lord; let her wear it Bene. Fair Beatrice, I thank you for your pains. out with good counsel.
Beat. I took no more pains for those thanks, than Leon. Nay, that's impossible ; she may wear her you take pains to thank me; if it had been painful heart out first.
I would not have come. D. Pedro. Well, we'll hear further of it by your Bene. You take pleasure in the message? daughter ; let it cool the while. I love Benedick Beat. Yea, just so much as you may take upon a well; and I could wish he would modestly examine knife's point, and choke a daw withal :- You have himself, to see how much he is unworthy so good a no stomach, signior; fare you well. (Exit. lady.
Bene. Ha! Against my will, I am sent to bid you Leon. My lord, will you walk ? dinner is ready. come to dinner — there's a double meaning in that, Claud. If he do not dote on her upon this, I will I took no more pains for those thanks, than
took never trust my expectation.
(Aside. pains to thank me — that's as much as to say, Any D. Pedro. Let there be the same net spread for pains that I take for you is as easy as thanks: - If her; and that must your daughter and her gentle- I do not take pity of her, I am a villain; if I do not woman carry. The sport will be, when they hold love her, I am a Jew: I will go get her picture. one an opinion of another's dotage, and no such
SCENE I. - Leonato's Garden. Where honey-suckles, ripen’d by the sun,
Forbid the sun to enter; — like favourites, Enter HERO, MARGARET, and URSULA.
Made proud by princes, that advance their pride Hero. Good Margaret, run thee into the parlour : Against that power that bred it : - there will she There shalt thou find my cousin Beatrice
hide her, Proposing with the prince and Claudio:
To listen our propose: This is thy office, Whisper her ear, and tell her, I and Ursula Bear thee well in it, and leave us alone. Walk in the orchard, and our whole discourse Marg. I'll make her come, I warrant you, pre. Is all of her; say, that thou overheard'st us;
(Erit. And bid her steal into the pleached bower,
Hero. Now, Ursula, when Beatrice doth come, 8 Thrown off. 9 Discoursing.
Seriously carried on.
As we do trace this alley up and down,
Consume away in sighs, waste inwardly : Our talk must only be of Benedick :
It were a better death than die with mocks. When I do name him, let it be thy part
Urs. Yet tell her of it; hear what she will say. To praise him more than ever man did merit: Hero. No; rather I will go to Benedick, My talk to thee must be, how Benedick
And counsel him to fight against his passion : Is sick in love with Beatrice: Of this matter And, truly, I'll devise some honest slanders Is little Cupid's crafty arrow made,
To stain my cousin with: One doth not know, That only wounds by hearsay. Now begin; How much an ill word may empoison liking.
Urs. O, do not do your cousin such a wrong. Enter BEATRICE, behind.
She cannot be so much without true judgment, For look where Beatrice, like a lapwing, runs (Having so swift and excellent a wit, Close by the ground, to hear our conference. As she is priz'd to have,) as to refuse
Urs. The pleasant'st angling is to see the fish So rare a gentleman as signior Benedick,
Hero. He is the only man of Italy,
Urs. I pray you, be not angry with me, madam, Is couch'd in the woodbine coverture:
Speaking my fancy; signior Benedick, Fear you not my part of the dialogue.
For shape, for bearing, argument, and valour, Hero. Then go we near her, that her ear lose Goes foremost in report through Italy. nothing
Hero. Indeed he hath an excellent good name. Of the false sweet bait that we lay for it.
Urs. His excellence did earn it, ere he had it. [They advance to the bower. When are you married, madam ? No, truly, Ursula, she is too disdainful;
Hero. Why, every day ; – to-morrow: Come I know, her spirits are as coy and wild
go in; As haggards of the rock.
I'll show thee some attires ; and have thy counsel, Urs.
But are you sure, Which is the best to furnish me to-morrow. That Benedick loves Beatrice so entirely ?
Urs. She's lim’d, I warrant you; we have caught Hero. So says the prince, and my new-trothed
her, madam. lord.
Hero. If it prove so, then loving goes by haps : Urs. And did they bid you tell her of it, madam? Some Cupid kills with arrows, some with traps. Hero. They did entreat me to acquaint her of it:
[Exeunt Hero and Ursula. But I persuaded them, if they loved Benedick, To wish him wrestle with affection,
BEATRICE advances. And never to let Beatrice know of it.
Beat. What fire is in mine ears? Can this be true? Urs. Why did you so ? Doth not the gentleman Stand I condemnd for pride and scorn so much? Deserve as full, as fortunate a bed,
Contempt, farewell ! and maiden pride, adieu ! As ever Beatrice shall couch upon ?
No glory lives behind the back of such. Hero. O God of love! I know, he doth deserve And, Benedick, love on, I will requite thee; As much as may be yielded to a man:
Taming my wild heart to thy loving hand . But nature never fram'd a woman's heart
If thou dost love, my kindness shall incite thee Of prouder stuff than that of Beatrice :
To bind our loves up in a holy band : Disdain and scorn ride sparkling in her eyes, For others say, thou dost deserve; and I Misprising what they look on; and her wit Believe it better than reportingly.
[Erit. Values itself so highly, that to her All matter else seems weak: she cannot love,
SCENE II. A Room in Leonato's House. Nor take no shape nor project of affection, She is so self-endeared.
Enter Don PEDRO, CLAUDIO, BENEDICK, and Urs. Sure, I think so ;
LEONATO. And therefore, certainly, it were not good
D. Pedro. I do but stay till your marriage be She knew his love, lest she make sport at it. consummate, and then I go toward Arragon.
Hero. Why, you speak truth: I never yet saw man, Claud. I'll bring you thither, my lord, if you'll
the crown of his head to the sole of his foot, he is If speaking, why, a vane blown with all wind : all mirth; he hath twice or thrice cut Cupid's bowIf silent, why, a block moved with none.
string, and the little hangman dare not shoot at So turns she every man the wrong side out; him: he hath a heart as sound as a bell, and his And never gives to truth and virtue, that
tongue is the clapper; for what his heart thinks, Which simpleness and merit purchaseth.
his tongue speaks. Urs. Sure, sure, such carping is not commendable. Bene. Gallants, I am not as I have been.
Hero. No: not to be so odd, and from all fashions, Leon. So say I; methinks you are sadder. As Beatrice is, cannot be commendable :
Claud. I hope, he be in love. But who dare tell her so? If I should speak, D. Pedro. Hang him, truant; there's no true She'd mock me into air ; 0, she would laugh me drop of blood in him, to be truly touch'd with love : Out of myself, press me to death with wit.
if he be sad, he wants money. Therefore let Benedick, like cover'd fire,
Bene. I have the tooth-ach. 2 A species of hawks.
D. Pedro. Draw it.
Bene. Hang it!
appear hereafter, and aim better at me by that I Claud. You must hang it first, and draw it after- | now will manifest: For my brother, I think he wards.
holds you well; and in dearness of heart hath holp D. Pedro. What? sigh for the tooth-ach ? to effect your ensuing marriage: surely, suit ill Leon. Where is but a humour, or a worm ? spent, and labour ill bestowed !
Bene. Well, every one can master a grief, but D. Pedro. Why, what's the matter ? be that has it.
D. John. I came hither to tell you; and, cirClaud. Yet say I, he is in love.
cumstances shortened, (for she hath been too long D. Pedro. There is no appearance of fancy in a talking of,) the lady is disloyal. him, unless it be a fancy that he hath to strange Claud. Who? Hero ? disguises; as, to be a Dutchman to-day; a French- D. John. Even she ; Leonato's Hero, your Hero, man to-morrow; or in the shape of two countries every man's Hero. at once. Unless he have a fancy to this foolery, Claud. Disloyal ? as it appears he hath, he is no fool for fancy, as D. John. The word is too good to paint out her you would have it appear he is.
wickedness; I could say, she were worse ; think Claud. If he be not in love with some woman, you of a worse title, and I will fit her to it. Wonder there is no believing old signs: he brushes his hat not till further warrant: go but with me to-night, o' mornings ; What should that bode?
you shall see her chamber-window entered; even D. Pedro. Hath any man seen him at the barber's? the night before her wedding-day: if you love her
Claud. No, but the barber's man hath been seen then, to-morrow wed her ; but it would better fit with him; and the old ornament of his cheek hath your honour to change your mind. already stuffed tennis-balls.
Claud. May this be so ? Leon. Indeed, he looks younger than he did by D. Pedro. I will not think it. the loss of a beard.
D. John. If you dare not trust that you see, conD. Pedro. Nay, he rubs himself with civet : Can fess not that you know : if you will follow me, I you smell him out by that ?
will show you enough; and when you have seen Claud. That's as much as to say, The sweet more and heard more, proceed accordingly. youth's in love.
Claud. If I see any thing to night why I should D. Pedro. The greatest note of it is his melancholy. not marry her to-morrow; in the congregation, Claud. And when was he wont to wash his face where I should wed, there will I shame her.
D. Pedro. Yea, or to paint himself? for the D. Pedro. And as I wooed for thee to obtain which, I hear what they say of him.
her, I will join with thee to disgrace her. Claud. Nay, but his jesting spirit; which is now D. John. I will disparage her no farther, till you crept into a lutestring, and now governed by stops. are my witnesses : bear it coldly but till midnight,
D. Pedro. Indeed, that tells a heavy tale for him: and let the issue show itself. Conclude, conclude, he is in love.
D. Pedro. O day untowardly turned ! Claud. Nay, but I know who loves him.
Claud. O mischief strangely thwarting! D. Pedro. That would I know too; I warrant, D. John. O plague right well prevented! one that knows him not.
So will you say, when you have seen the sequel. Claud. Yes, and his ill conditions; and, in despite
[Exeunt. of all, dies for him.
SCENE III. – A Street. Bene. Yet is this no charm for the tooth-ach. Old signior, walk aside with me: I have studied Enter DOGBERRY and Verges, with the Watch. eight or nine wise words to speak to you, which Dogb. Are you good men, and true ? these hobby-horses must not hear.
Verg. Yea, or else it were pity but they should [Exeunt BENEDICK and Leonato. suffer salvation. D. Pedro. For my life, to break with him about Dogb. Nay, that were a punishment too good for Beatrice.
them, if they should have any allegiance in them, Claud. 'Tis even so : Hero and Margaret bave being chosen for the prince's watch. by this played their parts with Beatrice; and then Verg. Well, give them their charge, neighbour the two bears will not bite one another, when they Dogberry. meet.
Dogb. First, who think you the most disheartless
man to be constable ? Enter Don Joun.
1 Watch. Hugh Oatcake, sir, or George Seacoal; D. John. My lord and brother, God save you. for they can write and read. D. Pedro. Good den, brother.
Dogb. Come hither, neighbour Seacoal. Heaven D. John. If your leisure served, I would speak hath blessed you with a good name: to be a well
favoured man is the gift of fortune ; but to write D. Pedro. In private ?
and read comes by nature. D. Pedro. If it please you ;- yet count Claudio 2 Watch. Both which, master constable, may hear; for what I would speak of, concerns him. Dogb. You have; I knew it would be your anD. Pedro. What's the matter?
Well, for your favour, sir, make no boast of D. John. Means your lordship to be married to it; and for your writing and reading, let that appear morrow?
(T. CLAUDIO. when there is no need of such vanity. You are D. Pedro. You know, he does.
thought here to be the most senseless and fit man for D. John. I know not that, when he knows what the constable of the watch ; therefore bear you the I know.
lantern: This is your charge; You shall comprehend Claud. If there be any impediment, I pray you, all vagrom men ; you are to bid any man stand, in discover it.
the prince's name. D. John. You may think I love you not ; let that 2 Watch. How, if he will not stand ?