As we do trace this alley up and down, Enter BEATRICE, behind. For look where Beatrice, like a lapwing, runs Urs. The pleasant'st angling is to see the fish Fear you not my part of the dialogue. Consume away in sighs, waste inwardly : Urs. O, do not do your cousin such a wrong. Urs. I pray you, be not angry with me, madam, Hero. Then go we near her, that her ear lose Goes foremost in report through Italy. nothing Of the false sweet bait that we lay for it. Hero. Indeed he hath an excellent good name. [They advance to the bower. When are you married, madam? No, truly, Ursula, she is too disdainful; Urs. Urs. And did they bid you tell her of it, madam? Urs. Why did you so? Doth not the gentleman Hero. Why, every day; - to-morrow: Come I'll show thee some attires; and have thy counsel, Hero. If it prove so, then loving goes by haps: BEATRICE advances. Beat. What fire is in mine ears? Can this be true? Hero. O God of love! I know, he doth deserve And, Benedick, love on, I will requite thee; As much as may be yielded to a man: All matter else seems weak: she cannot love, Urs. Sure, I think so; Enter Don PEDRO, CLAUDIO, BENEDICK, and D. Pedro. I do but stay till your marriage be consummate, and then I go toward Arragon. Claud. I'll bring you thither, my lord, if you'll vouchsafe me. D. Pedro. Nay, that would be as great a soil in the new gloss of your marriage, as to show a child his new coat, and forbid him to wear it. I will only be bold with Benedick for his company; for, from the crown of his head to the sole of his foot, he is all mirth; he hath twice or thrice cut Cupid's bowstring, and the little hangman dare not shoot at him he hath a heart as sound as a bell, and his tongue is the clapper; for what his heart thinks, his tongue speaks. Bene. Gallants, I am not as I have been. D. Pedro. Hang him, truant; there's no true Bene. Hang it! Claud. You must hang it first, and draw it afterwards. D. Pedro. What? sigh for the tooth-ach? Leon. Where is but a humour, or a worm? Bene. Well, every one can master a grief, but he that has it. Claud. Yet say I, he is in love. D. Pedro. There is no appearance of fancy in him, unless it be a fancy that he hath to strange disguises; as, to be a Dutchman to-day; a Frenchman to-morrow; or in the shape of two countries at once. Unless he have a fancy to this foolery, as it appears he hath, he is no fool for fancy, as you would have it appear he is. Claud. If he be not in love with some woman, there is no believing old signs: he brushes his hat o' mornings; What should that bode? D. Pedro. Hath any man seen him at the barber's? Claud. No, but the barber's man hath been seen with him; and the old ornament of his cheek hath already stuffed tennis-balls. Leon. Indeed, he looks younger than he did by the loss of a beard. D. Pedro. Nay, he rubs himself with civet: Can you smell him out by that? Claud. That's as much as to say, The sweet youth's in love. D. Pedro. The greatest note of it is his melancholy. Claud. And when was he wont to wash his face? D. Pedro. Yea, or to paint himself? for the which, I hear what they say of him. Claud. Nay, but his jesting spirit; which is now crept into a lutestring, and now governed by stops. D. Pedro. Indeed, that tells a heavy tale for him: Conclude, conclude, he is in love. Claud. Nay, but I know who loves him. D. Pedro. That would I know too; I warrant, one that knows him not. Claud. Yes, and his ill conditions; and, in despite of all, dies for him. Bene. Yet is this no charm for the tooth-ach. Old signior, walk aside with me: I have studied eight or nine wise words to speak to you, which these hobby-horses must not hear. [Exeunt BENEDICK and LEONATO. D. Pedro. For my life, to break with him about Beatrice. Claud. 'Tis even so: Hero and Margaret have by this played their parts with Beatrice; and then the two bears will not bite one another, when they meet. Enter Don JOHN. D. John. My lord and brother, God save you. D. Pedro. Good den, brother. D. John. If your leisure served, I would speak with you. D. Pedro. In private? yet count Claudio may hear; for what I would speak of, concerns him. D. Pedro. What's the matter? D. John. Means your lordship to be married tomorrow? [To CLAUDIO. D. Pedro. You know, he does. appear hereafter, and aim better at me by that I now will manifest: For my brother, I think he holds you well; and in dearness of heart hath holp to effect your ensuing marriage: surely, suit ill spent, and labour ill bestowed! D. Pedro. Why, what's the matter? D. John. I came hither to tell you; and, circumstances shortened, (for she hath been too long a talking of,) the lady is disloyal. Claud. Who? Hero? D. John. Even she; Leonato's Hero, your Hero, every man's Hero. Claud. Disloyal? D. John. The word is too good to paint out her wickedness; I could say, she were worse; think you of a worse title, and I will fit her to it. Wonder not till further warrant: go but with me to-night, you shall see her chamber-window entered; even the night before her wedding-day: if you love her then, to-morrow wed her; but it would better fit your honour to change your mind. Claud. May this be so? D. Pedro. I will not think it. D. John. If you dare not trust that you see, confess not that you know if you will follow me, will show you enough; and when you have seen more and heard more, proceed accordingly. Claud. If I see any thing to night why I should not marry her to-morrow; in the congregation, where I should wed, there will I shame her. D. Pedro. And as I wooed for thee to obtain her, I will join with thee to disgrace her. D. John. I will disparage her no farther, till you are my witnesses: bear it coldly but till midnight, and let the issue show itself. D. Pedro. O day untowardly turned ! Claud. O mischief strangely thwarting! D. John. O plague right well prevented! So will you say, when you have seen the sequel. [Exeunt. SCENE III. A Street. Enter DOGBERRY and VERGES, with the Watch. Dogb. Are you good men, and true? Verg. Yea, or else it were pity but they should suffer salvation. Dogb. Nay, that were a punishment too good for them, if they should have any allegiance in them, being chosen for the prince's watch. Verg. Well, give them their charge, neighbour Dogberry. Dogb. First, who think you the most disheartless man to be constable? 1 Watch. Hugh Oatcake, sir, or George Scacoal; for they can write and read. Dogb. Come hither, neighbour Seacoal. Heaven hath blessed you with a good name: to be a wellfavoured man is the gift of fortune; but to write and read comes by nature. swer. 2 Watch. Both which, master constable, Dogb. You have; I knew it would be your anWell, for your favour, sir, make no boast of it; and for your writing and reading, let that appear when there is no need of such vanity. You are thought here to be the most senseless and fit man for D. John. I know not that, when he knows what the constable of the watch; therefore bear you the I know. Claud. If there be any impediment, I pray you, discover it. D. John. You may think I love you not; let that lantern: This is your charge; You shall comprehend all vagrom men'; you are to bid any man stand, in the prince's name. 2 Watch. How, if he will not stand? Dogb. Why then, take no note of him, but let him go; and presently call the rest of the watch together, and thank heaven you are rid of a knave. Verg. If he will not stand when he is bidden, he is none of the prince's subjects. Dogb. True, and they are to meddle with none but the prince's subjects: You shall also make no noise in the streets; for, for the watch to babble and talk is most tolerable and not to be endured. 2 Watch. We will rather sleep than talk; we know what belongs to a watch. Dogb. Why, you speak like an ancient and most quiet watchman; for I cannot see how sleeping should offend: only, have a care that your bills 3 be not stolen: - Well, you are to call at all the ale-houses, and bid those that are drunk get them to bed. Dogb. If you meet a thief, you may suspect him, by virtue of your office, to be no true man; and, for such kind of men, the less you meddle or make with them, why, the more is for your honesty. 2 Watch. If we know him to be a thief, shall we not lay hands on him? Dogb. Truly, by your office, you may; but, I think, they that touch pitch will be defiled: the most peaceable way for you, if you do take a thief, is, to let him show himself what he is, and steal out of your company. Verg. You have been always called a merciful Bora. Stand thee close then under this penthouse, for it drizzles rain; and I will, like a true drunkard, utter all to thee. Watch [Aside.] Some treason, masters; yet stand close. Bora. Therefore know, I have earned of don John a thousand ducats. Con. Is it possible that any villainy should be so dear? Bora. Thou shouldst rather ask, if it were possible any villainy should be so rich; for when rich villains have need of poor ones, poor ones may make what price they will. Con. I wonder at it. Bora. That shows thou art unconfirmed 4: Thou knowest that the fashion of a doublet, or a hat, or a cloak, is nothing to a man. Con. Yes, it is apparel. Con. Yes, the fashion is the fashion. Bora. Tush! I may as well say, the fool's the fool. But see'st thou not what a deformed thief this fashion is? Watch. I know that Deformed; he has been a vile thief this seven year; he goes up and down like a gentleman: I remember his name. Bora. Didst thou not hear somebody? Bora. Seest thou not, I say, what a deformed thief this fashion is? how giddily he turns about all the hot bloods, between fourteen and five-andthirty? Con. All this I see; and see, that the fashion wears out more apparel than the man: But art not thou thyself giddy with the fashion too, that thou hast shifted out of thy tale into telling me of the fashion? Dogb. Why, then depart in peace, and let the Bora. Not so, neither: but know, that I have child wake her with crying; for the ewe that will to-night wooed Margaret, the lady Hero's gentle not hear her lamb when it baes, will never answer a calf when he bleats. Verg. 'Tis very true. if Dogb. This is the end of the charge. You, constable, are to present the prince's own person: you meet the prince in the night, you may stay him. Verg. Nay by'r lady, that, I think, he cannot. Dogb. Five shillings to one on't, with any man that knows the statues, he may stay him: marry, not without the prince be willing: for, indeed, the watch ought to offend no man; and it is an offence to stay a man against his will. Verg. By'r lady, I think it be so. Dogb. Ha, ha, ha! Well, masters, good night: an there be any matter of weight chances, call up me: keep your fellows' counsels and your own, and good night. Come, neighbour. 2 Watch. Well, masters, we hear our charge: let us go sit here upon the church-bench till two, and then all to-bed. Dogb. One word more, honest neighbours: I pray you, watch about signior Leonato's door; for the wedding being there to-morrow, there is a great coil to-night: Adieu, be vigitant, I beseech you. [Exeunt DCGBERRY and VERGES. 3 Weapons of the watchmen. woman, by the name of Hero; she leans me out at her mistress' chamber-window, bids me a thousand times good night, I tell this tale vilely: - - I should first tell thee, how the prince, Claudio, and my master, planted, and placed, and possessed by my master don John, saw afar off in the orchard this amiable encounter. Con. And thought they, Margaret was Hero? Bora. Two of them did, the prince and Claudio; but the devil my master knew she was Margaret; and partly by his oaths, which first possessed them, partly by the dark night, which did deceive them, but chiefly by my villainy, which did confirm any slander that don John had made, away went Claudio enraged; swore he would meet her as he was appointed, next morning at the temple, and there, before the whole congregation, shame her with what he saw over-night, and send her home again without a husband. 1 Watch. And one Deformed is one of them; know him, he wears a lock. Con. Masters, masters. Re-enter URSULA. Urs. Madam, withdraw; the prince, the count, signior Benedick, don John, and all the gallants of 2 Watch. You'll be made bring Deformed forth, the town, are come to fetch you to church. I warrant you. Con. Masters, 1 Watch. Never speak; we charge you, let us obey you to go with us. Bora. We are like to prove a goodly commodity, being taken up of these men's bills. Con. A commodity in question, I warrant you. Come, we'll obey you. [Exeunt. SCENE IV. A Room in Leonato's House. Enter HERO, MARGARET, and URSULA. Hero. Good Ursula, wake my cousin Beatrice, and desire her to rise. Urs. I will, lady. Hero. And bid her come hither. Urs. Well. [Eait URSULA. Marg. Troth, I think, your other rabato 5 were better., Hero. No, pray thee, good Meg, I'll wear this. Marg. By my troth, it's not so good; and I warrant, your cousin will say so. Hero. My cousin's a fool, and thou art another; I'll wear none but this. Marg. I like the new tire within excellently, if the hair were a thought browner: and your gown's a most rare fashion. I saw the duchess of Milan's gown, that they praise so. Hero. O that exceeds, they say. Marg. By my troth, its but a night-gown in respect of yours: Cloth of gold, and cuts, and laced with silver; set with pearls, down sleeves, sidesleeves, and skirts round, underborne with a bluish tinsel but for a fine, quaint, graceful, and excellent fashion, yours is worth ten on't. Hero. God give me joy to wear it, for my heart is exceeding heavy! Enter BEATRICE. Hero. Good morrow, coz. 'Tis almost By Beat. Good morrow, sweet Hero. Marg. For a hawk, a horse, or a husband? Marg. Get you some of this distilled Carduus Benedictus, and lay it to your heart; it is the only thing for a qualm. Hero. There thou prick'st her with a thistle. Beat. Benedictus! why Benedictus? you have some moral in this Benedictus. You may Marg. Moral! no, by my troth, I have no moral meaning; I meant, plain holy-thistle. think, perchance, that I think you are in love: nay, by'r lady, I am not such a fool to think what I list; nor I list not to think what I can; nor, indeed, cannot think, if I would think my heart out of thinking, that you are in love, or that you will be in love, or that you can be in love; yet Benedick was such another, and now is he become a man: he swore he would never marry; and yet now, in despite of his heart, he eats his meat without grudging and how you may be converted, I know not; but, methinks, you look with your eyes as other women do. Beat. What pace is this that thy tongue keeps? Marg. Not a false gallop. 5 A kind of ruff. Hero. Help to dress me, good coz, good Meg, good Ursula. [Exeunt. SCENE V. - Another Room in Leonato's House. Enter LEONATO, with DOG BERRY and VERGES. Leon. What would you with me, honest neighbour? Dogb. Marry, sir, I would have some confidence with you, that decerns you nearly. Leon. Brief, I pray you; for you see, 'tis a buy time with me. Dogh. Marry, this it is, sir. Verg. Yes, in truth, it is, sir. Leon. What is it, my good friends? Dogb. Goodman Verges, sir, speaks a little off the matter; an old man, sir, and his wits are not so blunt, as I would desire they were; but, in faith, honest, as the skin between his brows. Verg. Yes, I thank God, I am as honest as any man living, that is an old man, and no honester than I. Dogb. Comparisons are odorous: palabras, neighbour Verges. Leon. Neighbours, you are tedious. Dogb. It pleases your worship to say so, but we are the poor duke's officers; but truly, for mine own part, if I were as tedious as a king, I could find in my heart to bestow it all of your worship. Leon. All thy tediousness on me! ha! Dogb. Yea, and 'twere a thousand times more than 'tis: for I hear as good exclamation on your worship, as of any man in the city; and though I be but a poor man, I am glad to hear it. Verg. And so am I. Leon. I would fain know what you have to say. Verg. Marry, sir, our watch to-night, excepting your worship's presence, have ta'en a couple of as arrant knaves as any in Messina. Dogb. A good old man, sir; he will be talking; as they say, When the age is in, the wit is out: it is a world to see! 6- Well said, i'faith, neigbour Verges: well, an two men ride of a horse, one must ride behind : — An honest soul, i'faith, sir; by my troth he is, as ever broke bread: but, all men are not alike; alas, good neighbour! -- Leon. Indeed, neighbour, he comes too short of you; but I must leave you. deed, comprehended two aspicious persons, and Dogb. One word, sir; our watch, sir, have, inyour worship. we would have them this morning examined before Leon. Take their examination yourself, and bring it me; I am now in great haste, as it may appear unto you. Dogb. It shall be suffigance. well. Enter a Messenger. daughter to her husband. Mess. My lord, they stay for you to give your Leon. I will wait upon them; I am ready. [Exeunt LEONATO and Messenger. Dogb. Go, good partner, go, get you to Francis 5. c. It is wonderful to see. Seacoal, bid him bring his pen and inkhorn to the | here's that [Touching his forehead.] shall drive some gaol; we are now to examination these men. Verg. And we must do it wisely. of them to a non com: only get the learned writer to set down our excommunication, and meet me at Dogb. We will spare for no wit, I warrant you; the gaol. [Exeunt. ACT IV. Enter Don PEDRO, Don JOHN, LEONATO, Friar, CLAUDIO, BENEDICK, HERO, and BEATRICE, &c. Leon. Come, friar Francis, be brief; only to the plain form of marriage, and you shall recount their particular duties afterwards. Friar. You come hither, my lord, to marry this lady? Claud. No. Leon. To be married to her, friar; you come to marry her. Friar. Lady, you come hither to be married to this count? Hero. I do. Friar. If either of you know any inward impediment why you should not be conjoined, I charge you, on your souls, to utter it. Claud. Know you any, Hero? Friar. Know you any, count? Leon. I dare make his answer, none. Claud. O, what men dare do! what men may do! what men daily do! not knowing what they do! Bene. How now! Interjections? Why, then some be of laughing, as, ha! ha! he! Claud. Stand thee by, friar:-Father, by your leave! Will you with free and unconstrained soul Give me this maid, your daughter? Leon. As freely, son, as God did give her me. Claud. And what have I to give you back, whose worth May counterpoise this rich and precious gift? D. Pedro. Nothing, unless you render her again. Claud. Sweet prince, you learn me noble thankfulness. There, Leonato, take her back again; To witness simple virtue? Would you not swear, Not to be married, Claud. I know what you would say; if I have known her, You'll say, she did embrace me as a husband, I never tempted her with word too large 7; 7 Licentious. But, as a brother to his sister, show'd Hero. And seem'd I ever otherwise to you? Hero. Is my lord well, that he doth speak so wide? 8 I stand dishonour'd, that have Claud. Leonato, stand I here? And, by that fatherly and kindly power Leon. I charge thee do so, as thou art my child. Hero. O God defend me! how am I beset! What kind of catechising call you this? Claud. To make you answer truly to your name. Hero. Is it not Hero? Who can blot that name With any just reproach? Claud. Marry, that can Hero; Hero itself can blot out Hero's virtue. What man was he talk'd with you yesternight Out at your window, betwixt twelve and one? Now, if you are a maid, answer to this. Hero. I talk'd with no man at that hour, my lord. D. Pedro. Why, then are you nomaiden.-Leonato, I am sorry you must hear; Upon mine honour, Myself, my brother, and this grieved count, Did see her, hear her, at that hour last night, Talk with a ruffian at her chamber-window; Who hath, indeed, most like a liberal9 villain, Confess'd the vile encounters they have had A thousand times in secret. D. John. Fye, fye! they are Not to be nam'd, my lord, not to be spoke of; There is not chastity enough in language, Without offence to utter them: Thus, pretty lady, I am sorry for thy much misgovernment. Claud. O Hero! what a Hero hadst thou been, If half thy outward graces had been placed About thy thoughts, and counsels of thy heart! But, fare thee well, most foul, most fair! farewell, Thou pure impiety, and impious purity! For thee I'll lock up all the gates of love, |