and great strength, and great presence of mind, how to act for my father's good; yet in all this, I can safely say, that I rejoiced in my own afflictions: I thought it was good to be afflicted, that my heart might not be carried away by the world; and I trusted in the Lord, that he would protect my father; and bless my endeavours, that he would be able to withstand the malice of his enemies, till his term was out in the farm as the last year was the bearing year for cyder, and the breaking for crops would be without any expenses. But this my father despaired of seeing; however, I was promised that the Lord would protect us through; and so he did; and by my faith my father rose from his despair. As to my own sorrows I did not mind, as I reflected upon my early days, how soon I delighted in vanity and dress, more than I saw in others, and was often reproved by my mother; who would speak with a feeling heart, "Joanna, my dear child "Wilt thou then thy bright mornings waste, To trim and make thee fine ? "Twill be but bitterness at last, If Christ be none of thine. How frail is beauty, in how short a time And then an interest in thy Saviour find.” In this manner my mother used often to reprove me; but I must say, to my shame, it had only a momentary effect; so deeply was my heart fixed upon the vanity of dress, that I did not care how hard I worked, early and late, so long as I could earn money to get clothes to appear smart in. My father used warmly to re prove me, and say he was ashamed to see me, for a farmer's daughter to dress as I did; but all had no effect upon me; my heart was so set upon it, till sorrow broke it off. And when now I reflect back upon my youthful days, I see how flattery hurts the mind; for when I think on my childish days, my heart was set upon serious meditations, and I felt great comfort and pleasure in learning hymns and repeating them to myself; but when I came to the age of fifteen or sixteen, and began to be flattered by the world, I found vanity arise, and I became vain; but this vanity was of a short duration; for every thing I fixed my heart upon I was disappointed in, which made me turn all my thoughts, like my aunt Sarah, whom I have already inentioned; and as I have said of sorrow, it was good for me; so I say of my enemies, it is good for me that my heart has been sorely wounded by the malicious lies and inventions of men, or I might not have been so earnest in my petitions and prayers to the Lord to take the cause into his own hand, to put my enemies to shame and confusion: and therefore I shall conclude with saying-. "The very thorns that make the traveller bleed "Now I shall answer thee why I ordered thee to bring the history of thy father's family in a straight line together. The first I shall bring back to the fall, where the two were slain, by the arts of Satan's working. In a spiritual sense they died, as I had pronounced them dead: for this was the pride and rage of hell. Then the ages went on, like thy father's family, not to possess the inheritance I had designed for them; but now see in what manner thy father's land stands. Ye know not whether it can be regained or not, without diligently searching the wills, and knowing whether the heirship was ever cut off or not. For thou knowest, lands have been got of as long standing as thy father's; and therefore thou canst not tell that thy father's dream may not be yet fulfilled. So let the words appear. I sealed up my writings the old Christmas day at midnight, 1795. Soon after that my father came to see me. He did not know what I had done, but said he was in hopes he should have his lands, which he was heir to in Hertfordshire, about thirty miles from London; as he said, at midnight, old Christmas day, he thought he was quite awake, when a voice called him aloud, "Southcott! Southcott! thy name must spread far and wide: there is a lady in Hertfordshire, who hath great possessions for thee, and wants thy family to possess it." And so sure was my father that he should get it, that he went to Mr. Putt and asked him if he could direct him how to proceed; but Mr. Putt took no notice of it, only laughed about it to me, and said how old and foolish my father was grown. "Now leave his wisdom, till thou seest the end: And with thy father's history now go on; Because thou knowest how I have plac'd it there; To blast their peace, and death, thou knowest well, Men left the whole and ne'er sought out the land; Therefore I've so compar'd him with the land; And so thou knowest thy father did not drop, But now of him I bid thee call to mind, His love to thee at first it did When Satan's arts begin to work them on, "So that a likeness there is in you two: They'd have thee to commit against my word. Than the right way that I did direct thy hand, To say, "we'll hold thee to thy every word :” They'll say thy enemies are on record; If they should call thee there thou'rt forc'd to stand, |