While in this dark and lonely place,

I pray'd to Heav'n, to give me grace,
And health to do my duty.

Tho' I enjoy no costly dish,

If I can but obtain my wish,

Nor leave my task neglected;

Then I shall be a happy man;

For when we do the best we can,

What more can be expected?

"Tis my watch to day, as my comrades all say,
You know where I live if I'm wanted,
Whoever may come, will find me at home,
And, if right, their request shall be granted.

I have nothing to boast, nor am I proud of my post,
Tho' some may have different opinions ;

There are Captains below, who are ready to shew

The 'count-house, steam stamps, and the engines.

Whate'er you may think, I've had nothing to drink, Nor wish to be 'counted a glutton!

Thro' providence, kind, I've contentedly din'd

Off the bone of a shoulder of mutton.

In my dogg'rel rhyme, there is nothing sublime, 'Tis folly to boast of our knowledge;

But

you know there are folks, who are fond of their jokes, Who never were brought up at College.

As tales and backbiting I cannot endure,

I'll tell how, of late, I perform'd a great cure.

Last night 'twas not late when I came from the mine: The ev'ning was dark, but the weather was fine.

I was fresh as a rose, though perhaps you are thinking,
Tho' I came home so early, I might have been drinking.
I was got in my bed, ere the clock had struck seven,
(For I seldom did ever stay up till eleven,)

But I could not take rest, for, before I was sleeping,
An ill favor'd demon upon me was creeping.

(But don't be displeas'd if I make a digression,

I thought 'twas occasion'd for want of digestion.)
I did not get out to take open the door,

But stretch'd out my fingers and patted the floor.

They heard me below, and ran up to relieve me;

For they guess'd by my knocking that something did grieve

I was not quite awake to be well understood,

But I told them the story as well as I could.

[me.

"Queen Mab she has teas'd me,"-(I told this, at least)

"She's an ugly companion disturbing my rest,

"But I'll shew her a trick, if you mind what I say,
"Go fetch me my pipe and I'll smoke her away."

They brought me my pipe, and a candle with speed;
(The former before had been stuff'd with the weed,)
So I snatch'd my tobacco, ('tis truth what I say,)
And in less than a minute I smok'd her away.

Now I own I'm eccentric, yet think I was right,
For she never disturb'd me again for the night.

THE CLUB.

THE flags are unfurl'd! the procession's begun!
The members appear in their best ev'ry one,—
They march to the temple a sermon to hear:

But 'twas fully as well they had never gone there.

For while the Priest preach'd of converting the sinner, The Miners were thinking much more on their dinner.

And now they return to partake of the feast,

At table each fixes his eye on the best:

And then, after carving and feeding like hogs,

The bones are thrown out to make war 'mongst the dogs.

As of telling such tales most people are full,

I'll tell

you the tale of " a Cock and a Bull."Now some people's people to some people say, That some people's people do wrong ev'ry day, That some people's people are infamous wasters, Neglecting their duty and robbing their masters. But some people's people tell people, likewise, That some people's people tell some people lies.

And some people's people tell some people, too,
That some people's people do better all thro',
Than some people's people are able to do.

So to give people's people a bit of a rub,
To-morrow I'll tell them a tale of a Tub.

THE CLERICAL MARKSMAN (Who watched his Apples with a loaded Gun.)

HAD the Parson been present when Eve stole the fruit And stood at his post to attend it,

Prepar'd with his gun and so ready to shoot,

We might all give him thanks, aye and money to boot,

To see him so bent to defend it.

But it was not the case, for no Parson was there

To defend either apples or pears;

And so the old dame, being evily inclin'd,

And none to prevent, gave full scope to her mind,

And sat all the world by the ears.