A ARMY HEAD-QUARTERS Old is the song that I sing Old as my unpaid bills Old as the chicken that kitmutgars bring HASUERUS JENKINS of the 'Operatic Own,' His views on equitation were, perhaps, a trifle queer; He clubbed his wretched company a dozen times a day, He took two months at Simla when the year was at the spring, And underneath the deodars eternally did sing. She controlled a humble husband, who, in turn, controlled a Dept. Where Cornelia Agrippina's human singing-birds were kept From April to October on a plump retaining-fee, Supplied, of course, per mensem by the Indian Treasury. Cornelia used to sing with him, and Jenkins used to play; He praised unblushingly her notes, for he was false as they; So when the winds of April turned the budding roses brown, Cornelia told her husband:-'Tom, you mustn't send him down.' They haled him from his regiment which didn't much regret him; They found for him an office-stool, and on that stool they set him. To play with maps and catalogues three idle hours a day, And draw his plump retaining-fee-which means his double pay. Now, ever after dinner, when the coffee-cups are brought, STUDY OF AN ELEVATION, IN INDIAN INK This ditty is a string of lies. But-how the deuce did Gubbins rise? OTIPHAR GUBBINS, C. E., Stands at the top of the tree; And I muse in my bed on the reasons that led Potiphar Gubbins, C. E., Is seven years junior to Me; Each bridge that he makes either buckles or breaks, Potiphar Gubbins, C. E., Is coarse as a chimpanzee; And I can't understand why you gave him your hand, Lovely Mehitabel Lee. Potiphar Gubbins, C. E., Is dear to the Powers that Be; For They bow and They smile in an affable style, Potiphar Gubbins, C. E., Is certain as certain can be Of a highly paid post which is claimed by a host Careless and lazy is he, Greatly inferior to Me. What is the spell that you manage so well, 'Commonplace Potiphar G.? Lovely Mehitabel Lee, Let me inquire of thee, Should I have riz to what Potiphar is DELILAH We have another Viceroy now, those days are dead and done Of Delilah Aberyswith and depraved Ulysses Gunne. D ELILAH ABERYSWITH was a lady-not too young With a perfect taste in dresses and a badlybitted tongue, With a thirst for information, and a greater thirst for praise, By reason of her marriage to a gentleman in power, She patronised extensively a man, Ulysses Gunne, At the 'vastness of her intellect' with compliment unstinted. He went with her a-riding, and his love for her was such That he lent her all his horses and-she galled them very much. |