or handkerchief round patient's neck, in form of slip-noose, and secure other end of rope or handkerchief to spike or bed-post: rope or handkerchief should be sufficiently short to allow patient's feet to swing clear of incumbrances. If medicine does not operate in course of one hour, continue drops till successful.

Another Prepare fish-chowder, and infuse six ounces white arsenic ; administer large quantities, and await result.

Another: Plain but powerful: Take half-pint cold spring water and quarter-pint Prussic acid; mix, and sweeten with loaf sugar; administer draught to patient before each meal and on retiring to rest: at first omit every other day for one week; then take every day till cure is perfected.

pa

Another Very cheap: Place leaky wash-tub under pump-nose, and fill; place patient's head in wash-tub and let that fill; by the time tient's head has absorbed all the water that has not leaked out, cure is complete. Lovers anxious to extend their inquiries upon this branch of medicine, can consult city coroner with advantage: vide Directory. We have thus presented a brief but practical synopsis of the malady of Love, and the most approved methods of modern treatment.

In the course of an extensive practice, we have been daily cognizant of many peculiarly aggravated cases, in which this system of medicine has been attended with the happiest results; and we can, with the utmost confidence, recommend it to the patronage of the masculine public. With a brief report of a desperate case which we subjected to fancy treatment, we shall close the present treatise:

:

'Called in April 7, 1844. Patient male; age nineteen; cheek flushed pulse feeble and irregular; appetite poor. Immediately amputed patient's left whisker, and right lobe of chin-undergrowth: prescribed a fishing excursion.

'APRIL 8: Patient stronger, but feverish: pulse full; low-spirited from loss of left whisker; amputated right one immediately; whereupon patient picked up pieces, and fainted. Exhibited a fumigation of tobacco, and prescribed goose diet.

APRIL 9 Patient much improved; but thought it expedient to amputate left lobe of chin-undergrowth, whereupon patient wept ; prescribed moderate exercise in open air, blue coat, bright buttons and scarf: continued goose diet and increased fumigations two cigars.

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'APRIL 10: Patient decidedly improved; reconciled to loss of whiskers and chin-undergrowth: caused him to examine Daguerreotype likeness of lady through piece of cracked window-glass, which excited wholesome disgust; exhibited six pounds steak, and brandy mixture; increased fumigations as before.

'APRIL 11: Patient made light breakfast on cigars; wrote essay to prove women destitute of souls; and paid us our bill of fees: pronounced patient well.

'APRIL 16: Called in, in haste; patient saw lady at ball, and suffered relapse symptoms alarming; eyes green, tongue coated, and pockets empty found him perusing Plato on immortality of soul, and inclined to believe; the most energetic measures only would avail: immediately divided jugular vein and wrote obituary: patient discharged cured.

THE GALE S OF SPRING.

BY CLAUDE HALORO.

'THE following lines were written after a spring visit to a friend who resided in Stamford Park, Canada, the well-known country residence of Sir PEREGRINE MAITLAND, while Governor of Upper Canada. The brilliant wild-flowers, the pine groves, and the balm-breathing winds of spring, are still its own at the proper season; but alas! it is in its decadence in other respects. The ornamental gilding of the once beautiful cottage drawing-room is tarnished, and the out-houses, lawns and shrubberies are falling to decay.'- NOTE TO THE EDITOR.

METHOUGHT I was exploring the hidden recesses of an extensive cave, whose winding passages had never before echoed to the tread of human foot. With ever-fresh admiration and delight, I was gazing at the thousand wonders which the flashing torch-light revealed on every side, at each step of my progress, when a strange sound, as of the hum of many voices, fell upon my ear. What such a sound could mean in such a place was more than I could divine.

Curiosity led me on in the direction whence it came. The buzz of conversation, cheerful as it would seem from the occasional bursts of merriment that were heard, grew more and more distinct, until the dark and narrow passage I had been following suddenly opened upon one of those magnificent rock-parlors, of whose grandeur and beauty descrip. tion can convey but a faint idea. A flood of light illuminated the arching roof with the vast columns of stalactite sparkling with crystals that supported it, and was reflected with imposing effect from the huge sheets of the same material, of the purest white, that hung from the ceiling in graceful but substantial drapery. I stood in one of nature's noblest - but not alone.

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A strange company had gathered there. Black spirits and white, blue spirits and gray,' were before me. A festive occasion had assembled in joyous mood and in holiday attire the first born of creation, the ELEMENTS of things.

In dreams nothing ever surprises us. It seemed perfectly natural to see these fairy forms in that strange grotto; so, accosting without hesitation the one nearest to me, I apologized for my intrusion, and was about to withdraw. From my new acquaintance, however, I received so cordial a welcome, and so earnest an invitation to become a partaker

in their festivities, that I could not deny myself the pleasure of accepting the hospitality so kindly proffered.

I was soon informed that some of the leading characters among the Elements had resolved some weeks before upon having a general picnic dinner party. Fifty-six family invitations had accordingly been sent out, one to each of the brotherhood; and preparations for the feast made upon a most extensive scale. Sea and land had been ransacked for delicacies, and every thing was put in requisition that could minister to the splendor of the entertainment or to the enjoyment of the occasion.

At the hour I so unexpectedly came upon them, nearly all the guests with their families had assembled in the strange drawing-room I have described, awaiting the summons to the banquet. Spacious as that drawing-room was, it was nearly filled with these interesting children of Nature. And here they were; seen, not as in the chemist's laboratory, writhing in the heated crucible, or pent up in glassy prisons; or peering out of gas-holders and Florence flasks, but arrayed in their native beauty; each free as air, and acting as impulse prompted. There were those present of every hue, every style of dress, every variety of appearance. The Metals, the Gases, the Salts, the Acids, the Oxides, the Alkalies all were there. From the mine, from the shop of the artizan, from the mint, from the depths of ocean even, they had come; and a gayer assemblage, a more animating scene, my eyes had never beheld.

Many of the ladies of the party were most tastefully attired. Chlorine wore a beautiful greenish-yellow robe, that displayed her queen-like form to good advantage. The fair daughters of Chromium particularly attracted my attention, with their gay dresses of the liveliest goldenyellow and orange-red. Iodine had but just arrived, and was not yet disencumbered of an unpretending outer garment of steel-gray that enveloped her person; but the warmth of the apartment soon compelled her to throw this aside, when she appeared arrayed in a vesture of thin gauze, of the most splendid violet color imaginable. Carbonic Acid was there, but not clad in the airy robes in which I expected to see her. The pressure of the iron hand of adversity had been upon her, and now her attire was plain; simply a dress of snowy white; the best which the straightened circumstances to which she had been reduced allowed her to assume. Quite a contrast to her was her mother Carbon, whom you would have supposed to be a widow in deep mourning, or a nun who had taken the black-veil, so sable were her garments, so gloomy her countenance, had not her ear-rings of polished jet, and a circlet of diamonds that glittered on her brow, evinced that she had not yet altogether renounced the vanities of the world. The belle of the room appeared to be Nitrous Acid, the graceful daughter of Nitrogen; airy in all her movements, and with dress of deepest crimson, that corresponded well with a lip and cheek rivalling the ruby in their redness.

Among the lady Metals too, there were many of bright faces and resplendent charms: but I must pass on to a description of the gentlemen of the party. Sulphur wore a suit of modest yellow-plush, while Phosphorus quite disconcerted some of the more decorous of the matrons present, by making his appearance in a pair of flesh-colored tights.

Phosphuretted Hydrogen, or as he is nick-named Will of the Wisp,' startled me by flitting by in a robe of living flame, the dress in which the graceless youngster is said to haunt church-yards and marshy places, playing his pranks upon poor benighted travellers.

The King of the Metals, Gold, was arrayed in truly gorgeous apparel; though it must be confessed there was a glitter and an air of haughtiness about him, from which you would turn with pleasure to the mild sweet face of his royal sister, Silver, who leaned upon his arm; a bright-eyed, unassuming creature, of sterling worth.

Mercury was there, as lively and as versatile as ever; a most restless being; now by the thermometer, noting the subterranean temperature; now by the barometer, predicting a storm in the regions overhead; now, arm-in-arm with this metal, then with that; and they all, by the way, save stern old Iron, had hard work to shake him off. A strange character surely was he; a philosopher of uncommon powers of reflection; the veriest busy-body in the world; well versed in the art of healing; a practical amalgamationist; in short, a complete factotum. Potassium, though a decidedly brilliant-looking fellow, manifested too much levity in his deportment to win respect, and was pronounced, by those who knew him best, to be rather soft. In gravity Platinum surpassed all the company; in natural brightness, Tin was outshone by few.

When Oxygen arrived, and his light, elastic tread was heard, and his clear transparent countenance was seen among them, a murmur of congratulation ran round the drawing-room, and involuntarily all assembled arose to do him homage. He was a patriarch indeed among them; literally a father to many of the younger guests. His arrival was the signal for adjournment to the banqueting-room, where of right he took his seat at the head of the table.

Touching the apartment we had now entered, I can only say that it was grand beyond description! It was lighted up with the radiance of noon-day, by an arch of flame intensely dazzling, produced by a curious apparatus which Galvanism, who excels in these matters, had contrived for the occasion, out of some materials with which his friends Zinc and Copper had furnished him. Festoons of evergreens and wreaths of roses encircled the alabaster columns, and made the whole look like

hall in Fairy Land.

But I must describe the table and its paraphernalia. The preparation of the viands-I mean the baking, boiling, roasting, stewing and the like had been committed to Caloric, who has had long experience in that department. The nobler of the Metals had generously lent their costly services of plate, while Carbon united with Iron to furnish the elegant steel cutlery used on the occasion. Alumina provided the fine set of china that graced the table; and Silex and Potash, without solicitation, sent, as their joint contribution, cut-glass pitchers and tumblers, of superior pattern and transparency.

As among these sons of Nature there is no craving for artificial excitement, Oxygen and Hydrogen, (who by the way have done more for the Cold Water Societies than DELAVAN or FATHER MATTHEW,) were commissioned to provide the drinkables; and what beverage they furnished may easily be conjectured. Carbon, with Oxygen and Hydrogen,