the separation of their affections. They themselves are previously so wedded to separate views, that they almost always propose to themselves, in marrying, such as are mutually wide of one another, and cannot be perfectly accomplished together, at least in any consistency with that one common view, which both ought to make the sole end of marrying.

They who marry on whim or humour, build a castle on the clouds, and see it tumble to the ground in ruins before they can enjoy themselves in it a single week. The sensualists lay a foundation almost as insecure, and accordingly seldom prolong their satisfaction beyond the end of the first month. When pride is the chief motive to matrimony, it never fails to inspire the one party with tyranny, and the other with rebellion. It is no wonder, and as little matter, if they, who through covetousness sell themselves into this state, are treated afterward as slaves and beasts, rather than as free and rational creatures. Conjugal love can never subsist on its own free and generous footing in that country, where the wives are by law put almost on a level with the servants; nor can the benefits of subordination, though in particular cases become absolutely necessary to peace, be hoped for in that other, which hath made them legally independent on their husbands.

To make marriages happy, the state itself ought to be well understood; the true and rational ends of entering into it, carefully considered; the customs of the world, so far as they are culpable in themselves or detrimental to those ends, thoroughly despised; and the wrong motives to marriage already mentioned, either wholly laid aside, or kept in so distant a point of view, that but a very slight disappointment shall be suffered, in case they happen to be but indifferently provided for. They who will not take this advice, and yet are weak enough to hope for happiness in a married state, run the hazard of acting over again the tragedy of their first parents, and of expulsion from that paradise they vainly promise themselves, while a feast on its forbidden fruits is preferred to all its solid and wholesome joys, till time and woful experience open their eyes, and convince them, that all their sensual, worldly, and ambitious views, were but so many temptations or illusions; and that, instead of being made happier than God hath allowed them to be, they are

become as miserable as their enemy could wish them in this life.

Such things are they to avoid who intend to marry wisely; and the things they are to aim at, are the true, the natural, the Scriptural ends of matrimony. These are judiciously distinguished and set out by our liturgy, and are but three; the raising up of an honourable and legitimate posterity; the preservation of virtue; and the social assistance and comfort which two persons, thus joined together, may receive from each other, but not possibly from all the other persons or possessions in the world.

It is, no doubt, an unspeakable satisfaction every reasonable father receives from a well-grounded belief (which in regard to a spurious brood, can never take place) that his own real issue are to be the objects of his love and care, and are to inherit the fruits of his labour and frugality. But it is a much greater, to find one, in whom he can safely centre all his otherwise dissipated and criminal affections; in whom he can repose an entire confidence, and from whom he is assured of large returns for every instance of love, of tenderness, of generosity, which the kindest heart can give to the most beloved object, an object able to sweeten all his afflictions, and redouble all his comforts. The pleasure of an ordinary heart arises from the satisfaction it receives from without. The happiness of a great and noble soul, from the satisfactions it imparts. A truly good couple feast on both in their highest human perfection, and know no greater joy, excepting that which they hope for, when death shall divorce them, in order to a yet infinitely happier marriage, with their Redeemer.

Behold the important and blessed ends, which they ought to have in view, who would wish to be wisely and happily married; and tell me, whether family, whether fortune, whether titles and posts of honour are to be set in competition with these. On these let the youth of both sexes (for to them only I direct this discourse) fix their attention; and then let them hear the advice I am about to give, which, if followed, will hardly fail to furnish each of them with that help meet for each,' which God, as my tèxt sets forth, graciously intended they should obtain.

To avoid repetition and confusion, I speak, for the most

part, as to men, but intend what I say equally for the other sex. In the first place, let every one who thinks of marriage, consider with himself, whether he is qualified for that state or not, whether he labours under any incurable or loathsome disorders of body, which may, when known, prevent the possibility of his becoming, or continuing, an object of conjugal affection.

If he is free from all impediments of this sort, let him next consider, whether he is not naturally, or habitually subject to disorders of a yet more disqualifying nature; I mean those

of the mind.

A proud disposition is very unfit for a state, wherein so much meekness, complacency, mutual resignation, and mutual forbearance, are necessarily required. A haughty spirit can never brook a superior, nor bear an equal. It is impossible it should become one with any kind of temper. With an humble one it cannot, because it is of so different a nature; with a proud one it will not, because it is of the same; for none hates pride so much as he that is most addicted to it himself. Besides, hatred is but one degree, and that a small one, more opposite to love, than pride. Pride is founded on the conceit of too much worth to admit of any services or kindnesses but as a small part only of what it merits ; and therefore he always insults, who pretends to oblige, the proud; for what can be added to one who is already selfsufficient? It is easy to see what a contempt of kind offices is likely to do in a state, where happiness cannot subsist but on love; and where love hath nothing to feed it, but a lively sense of mutual kindness, ever apter to overrate, than undervalue, each act of friendship, and even each affectionate intention.

In the next place, an angry temper is enough to render him, who is subject to it, unfit for a state which hardly admits of a medium between the highest sweets of peace, and the bitterest effects of war. The ties of matrimonial union are of too tender and delicate a nature to resist the violent shocks of so rude and outrageous a passion, which often, like thunder, in one furious moment, blasts and batters to the ground that affection which had been the lovely growth of many a year's endearment. It is only among doves, and other the meeker kind of brutes, that we observe any thing

like marriage. Lions, tigers, wolves, and the like fierce and fiery animals, are not known to associate in pairs. As often as a human lion and lioness happen to be joined, we know too well, and they know to their cost, what sort of lives they lead; and when one of this stormy disposition is married to another of a gentle and delicate turn, the boisterous carriage on the one side, together with the silent suffering grief on the other, present us with a sight as piteous, as the other is hideous.

Hardly less opposite to that state, wherein all the happiness hoped for must spring from love, is a dark and sullen temper, which can neither love, nor be loved. There is no planting tender affections upon this rock. Were you to fill a vessel, like this, with honey, or with a compound of all the highest sweets in nature, the whole would sour in a very little time, and turn to vinegar and gall. Such a mind is the proper element of secret discontents, which it nourishes in a surly silence; of virulent humours, which it begets on itself, without the concurrence of another, by a sort of diabolical generation; and of hatred equally causeless and unaccountable.

Again, a man of scattered affections and a fickle turn of mind, should beware of binding himself for life to one. Such a temper can never be united to another. To a fickle one, it cannot, because in both there is a disposition to fly off. To a constant one it cannot, because if but one of the parties varies, it is sufficient to separate that from the other which is fixed. To be tied by the conscience, and at the same time set adrift by the heart, places the mind in such a state of distraction, between duty and pleasure, as makes it impossible to provide for either. A marriage can never be happy, if one of the parties cannot please the other. But it is impossible to please that person whose temper one does not know. Now, the fickle is of all tempers by turns, and it is as easy to foresee which way the wind will blow next, as to guess, of what mind he will be to-morrow.

Again, the jealous ought not to marry; for in marriage there can be no happiness without mutual confidence. Destroy that once, and the warmest love, though otherwise the very life and soul of this union, becomes the grand bone of contention. Neither strong appearances, nor even manifestly bad actions, will leave deeper impressions on a sound mind,

than his own crazy suspicions will force on the jealous, when nothing amiss hath been done, nor even the smallest appearances, have been given. But as no human creature is perfect, nor always on the watch, small faults will be committed, and sometimes the probability of greater will arise, when nothing but absolute perfection, or, at worst, but a sufficient stock of care and caution is wanting. Now, he that hath jealousy for a natural distemper, and is, over and above, infected with a general ill opinion of human nature, arising either from a very corrupt turn of mind in himself, or from a criminal experience, is sure to make the most of every thing to realize appearances, and magnify faults into crimes.

Lastly, one of a selfish disposition ought never to engage in a state of life so social, as that of matrimony. The satisfactions of the selfish are greatest to him alone and apart from others. What the rest of mankind, what even his nearest relatives, father, mother, children, wife, enjoy, he looks upon as so much lost to himself; and hath no notion, that enjoyments of any kind can be increased by being shared. Now it is participation only that in a married state improves every comfort, every pleasure, up to perfection; that heightens ordinary fare into delicacies; and raises cottages into palaces. He that cannot place his happiness at least as much in giving, as receiving, may be married, but can never have a wife. There is more of exchange and commerce in the matrimonial, than in any other sort of society; and here, therefore, of all markets, it is most unreasonable, nay iniquitous, to think of trading, if we cannot find in our hearts to lay out.

What then, you will here cry out, are all people subject to these infirmities, many or most of which are natural, to abstain from marriage? The answer is, every one should abstain from that which is likely to bring him into a worse, instead of a better condition, than his present one; and whether matrimony will probably better the condition of one who is very proud, passionate, sullen, fickle, suspicious, or selfish ; let all people, whom it may concern, judge for themselves. A low degree of these culpable qualities is not sufficient to render any one wholly unfit for matrimony; nor even a higher, if the mind, from true piety and its other virtues, hath force sufficient to master it. But in whatsoever degree, dispositions so untoward, affect the mind, in the same degree