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for, indeed, I had most of them out of prison. There's but a shirt and a half in all my company ; and the half-shirt is two napkins, tacked together, and thrown over the shoulders like a herald's coat without sleeves !”
An old schoolfellow of ours (who, by the way, was more fond of quoting Falstaff than any other of Shakspeare's characters) used to be called upon for a story, with a view to a joke of this sort, it being an understood thing that he had a privilege of exaggeration, without committing his abstract love of truth. The reader knows the old blunder attributed to Goldsmith about a dish of green peas. Somebody had been applauded in company for advising his cook to take some ill-dressed peas to Hammersmith, “because that was the way to Turn'em Green;" upon which Goldsmith is said to have gone and repeated the pun at another table in this fashion :-“John should take those peas, I think, to Hammersmith.” “Why so, Doctor?” " Because that is the way to make 'em green.” Now, our friend would give the blunder with this sort of additional dressing. sight of the dishes of vegetables, Goldsmith, who was at his own house, took off the covers, one after another, with great anxiety, till he found that peas were among them ; upon which he rubbed his hands with an air of infinite and prospective satisfaction. “You are fond of peas, sir ?' said one of the company.
“Yes, sir,' said Goldsmith, particularly so. them all the year round. I mean, sir, every day in the season. I do not think there is anybody so fond of peas as I am.' 'Is there any particular reason, Doctor,' asked a gentleman present, 'why you like peas so much, beyond the usual one of their agreeable taste?' 'No, sir, none whatsoever ;-none, I assure you.' (Here Goldsmith showed a great wish to impress this fact on his guests). “I never heard any particular encomium or speech about them from any one else ; but they carry their own eloquence with them. They are things, sir, of infinite taste.' (Here a laugh, which put Goldsmith in additional spirits) 'But, bless me!' he exclaimed, looking narrowly
into the peas, 'I fear they are very ill done. They are absolutely yellow instead of green' (here he put a strong emphasis on green), 'and, you know, peas should be emphatically green. Greenness in a pea is a quality as essential as whiteness in a lily. The cook has quite spoilt them ; but I'll give the rogue a lecture, gentlemen, with your permission.' Goldsmith then rose and rang the bell violently for the cook, who came in, ready booted and sp ed. "Ha!' exclaimed Goldsmith, 'those boots and spurs are your salvation, you knave. Do you know, sir, what you have done ?' “No, sir.' "Why, you have made the peas yellow, sir. Go instantly, and take 'em to Hammersmith. ‘To Hammersmich, sir ? ' cried the man, all in astonishment, the guests being no less so. 'Please, sir, why am I to take 'em to Hammersmith ?' Because, sir,' and here Goldsmith looked round with triumphant anticipation, that is the way to render those peas green !'
There is a very humorous piece of exaggeration in “ Butler's Remains," a collection, by-the-bye, well worthy of “ Hudibras," and, indeed, of more interest to the general reader. Butler is defrauded of his fame with readers of taste who happen to be no politicians, when“ Hudibras” is printed without this appendage. The piece we allude to is a short description Holland :
“A country that draws fisty foot of water,
That feed, like cannibals, on other fishes,
In which they do not live, but go aboard." We do not know, and perhaps it would be impossible to discover, whether Butler wrote his minor pieces before those of the great patriot Andrew Marvell, who rivalled him in wit, and excelled him in poetry. Marvell, though born later, seems to have been known earlier as an author. He was certainly known publicly before him. But in the political poems of Marvell there
is a ludicrous “Character of Holland,” which might be pro-
“Holland, that scarce deserves the name of land,
Glad then, as miners who have found the ore,
Transfusing into them their dunghill soul.”
“How did they rivet with gigantic piles
"Dryden afterwards, of fighting for gain, in his song of “Come, if you dare”:
“The Gods from above the mad labour behold.” † A Free Ocean.
A daily deluge over them does boil ;
We can never read these or some other ludicrous verses of Marvell, even when by ourselves, without laughter; but we must curtail our self-indulgence for the present.
FATAL MISTAKE OF NERVOUS DISORDERS
OME affecting catastrophes in the public papers induce us
to say a few words on the mistaken notions which are so
often, in our opinion, the cause of their appearance. It is much to be wished that some physician, truly so called, and philosophically competent to the task, would write a work on this subject. We have plenty of books on symptoms and other alarming matters, very useful for increasing the harm already existing. We believe, also, there are some works of a different kind, if not written in direct counteraction ; but the learned authors are apt to be so prodigiously grand and etymological in their title-pages, that they must frighten the general understanding with their very advertisements.
There is this great difference between what is generally understood by the word insanity, and the nervous or melancholy disorders, the excess of which is so often confounded with it. Insanity is a consequence of malformation of the in, and is by no means of necessity attended with melancholy, or even illhealth. The patient, in the very midst of it, is often strong, healthy, and even cheerful. On the other hand, nervous disorders, or even melancholy in its most aggravated state, is nothing but the excess of a state of stomach and blood, extremely common. The mind, no doubt, will act upon that state and exasperate it ; but there is great reaction between mind and body; and as it is a common thing for a man in an ordinary