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tell her the whole story, and do it with all the Lady. Every circumstance to a tittle! art you are master of, that the surprise may Sir G. Then, lady, the wedding night! I not be too great for her.
saw you in your white satin night-gown : you Vel. It shall be done-But since her bo would not come out of your dressing-room, till pour has seen this apparition, she desires to Sir George took you out by force. He drew see you once more, before you encounter it. you gently by the hand-You struggled--but
Sir G. I shall expect her impatiently. For he was too strong for you—You blushed ; now I can talk to her without being interrupt-heed by that impertinent rogue Tinsel. I hope Lady. Oh! stop there! go no farther-He thou hast not told Abigail any thing of the se knows every thing.
Abi. Truly, Mr. Conjuror, I believe you Vel. Mrs. Abigail is a woman ; there are have been a wag in your youth. many reasons why she should not be acquaint Sir G. Mrs. Abigail, you know what your ed with it: I shall only mention six--
good word cost Sir George; a purse of broad Sir G. Hush, here she comes! O my heart ! | pieces, Mrs. Abigail
Abi.' The devil's in him. [Aside.] Pray, Enter LADY and ABIGAIL.
Sir, since you have told so far, you should teli
my lady that I refused to take them. Sir G. [Aside, while VELLUM talks in dumb "Sir Ġ. 'Tis true, child, he was forced to show to LADY.] 'O) that loved woman ! How I trust them into your bosom." long to take her in my arms! If I find I am Abi. This rogue will mention the thousand still dear to her memory, it will be a return to pound, if I don't take care. (Aside.] Pray, Sir, life indred! But I must take care of indulging though you are a conjuror, methinks you need tbis tenderness, and put on a behaviour more not be a blabsuitable to my present character.
Lady. Sir, since I have now no reason to (Walks at a distance, in a pensive posture, doubt of your art, I must beseech you to treat wuring his wand.
this apparition gently-It has the resemblance Lady. (To Vellum.] This is surprising in- of my deceased husband ; if there be any undeed! So all the servants tell me; they say discovered secret, any thing that troubles his he knows every thing that bas happened in the rest, learn it of him. family.
Sir G. I must to that end be sincerely inAbi. [Aside.] A parcel of credulous fools ; | formed by you, whether your heart be engaged they first tell bim their secrets, and then won to another. Have not you received the adder how he comes to know them.
dresses of many lovers since his death? [Exit VELLUM, exchanging fond looks with Lady. I have been obliged to receive more ABIGAIL.
visits than have been agreeable. Lady. Learned Sir, may I have some conver. Sir G. Was not Tipsel welcome ? I'm sation with you, before you begin your cere. afraid to hear an answer to iny own ques. monies ?
tion. Sir G. Speak! but hold-first let me feel Lady. He was well recommended. your pulse..
Sir G. Racks !
[Aside. Lady. What can you learn from that?
La y. Of a good family. Sir G. I have already learned a secret from Sir G. Tortures !
[Aside. it, that will astonish you.
Lady. Heir to a considerable estate. Lady. Pray wbatis it?
Sir G. Death! [Aside.] And you still love Sir G. You will bave a husband within this him?- I'm distracted!
Lady. No, I despise him. I found he had a Abi. (Aside.] I am glad to hear that He design upon my fortune; was base, profligate, must mean Mr. Fantome; I begin to think cowardly, and every thing that could be ex. there's a good deal of truth in his art.
pected from a man of the vilest principles. Lady. Alas! I fear you mean I shall see Sir Sir G. I'm recovered.
[Aside. George's apparition a second time,
Abi. Oh. Madam, had you seen how like a Sir G. Have courage, you shall see the ap- scoundrel he looked when he left your lady. parition no more. The husban . I mention shall | ship in a swoon! Where have you left my lady? be as much alive as I am.
says I. In an elbow-chair, child, says he. Abi. Mr Fantome to be sure,
And where are ye going? says I. To town, Lally. Impossible ! I loved my first too well.child, says he : for, to tell thee truly, child,
Sir G. You could not love the first better says he, I don't care for living under the same than you will love the second.
roof with the devil. Abi. [Aside.] I'll be hanged if my dear! Sir G. Well, lady, I see nothing in all this steward has not instructed him; he means Mr. that may hinder Sir George's spirit from being Fantome, to be sure : the thousand pound is at rest. our own.
Lady. If he knows any thing of what passes Lady. Alas! you did not know Sir George. | in my heart, he cannot but be satisfied of that
Sir G. As well as I do mysell- I saw him fondness which I bear to his memory. My sorwith you in the red damask room, when he first row for hiin is always fresh when I think of made love to you ; your mother left you toge- him. He was the kindest, truest, tenderest ther, under pretence of receiving a visit from Tears will not let me go 01 Mrs. Hawthorn, on her return from London. Sir G. This quite overpowers me-I shall Lady. This is astonishing.
discover myself before my time. [Aside.)Sir G. You were a great admirer of a single | Madam, you may now retire, and leave me to life for the first half hour; your refusals then myself." grew still fainter and fainter. With what ec- Lady. Success attend you ! stacy did Sir George kiss your hand, when you Ali. I wish Mr. Fantome gets well off from told him you should always follow the advice this old Don-I know he'll be with him imme. of your mamma.
[Exeunt LADY and ABIGAIL.
Sir G. My heart is now at ease ; she is the Enter Sir GEORGE in his own habit. same dear woman I left ber---Now for my revenge upon Fantome. I shall cut the cere! Fan. Ha! what's that! Sir George Truman. monies short. A few words will do his busi. This can be no counterfeit. His dress! his ness- Now let me seat myself in forma shape ! his face ! the very wound of which he good easy chair for a conjuror, this Now died ! Nay then, 'tis time to decamp! for a few mathematical scratches- a good
(Runs off: lucky scrawl that- Faith I think it looks Sir G. Ha, ha, ha! Fare you well. very astrological- These two or three magi- good Sir George- The enemy bas left me cal pot-hooks about it, make it a complete con- master of the field : here are the marks of my juror's scheme. [Drum beats.) Ha, ha, ha! victory. This drum will I hang up in my Sir! are you there? Now must I pore upon great ball as the trophy of the day. my paper.
Enter ABIGAIL; Sir GEORGE stands with his
hand before his face, in a musing posture. Enter FANTOME, beating his drum.
Abi. Yonder he is. O my conscience, he Pr'vthee don't make a noise, I'm busy:- has driven off the conjuror. Mr. Fantume. [FANTOME beats. A pretty march ! pr'y thee Mr. Fantome! I give you joy, I give you joy. beat that over again. (He beats and udran- What do you think of your thousand pounds ces. Sir G. Rising.] Ha! you're very per- now? Why does not the man speak?" fect in the step of a ghost. You stalk it
[Pulls him by the sleere. maiestically. FANTOME advances. How the
Sir G. Ha ! [Taking his hand from his face. rogue : tares, he acts it to admiration ; I'll be
Abi. Oh! 'tis my master! hanged if he has not been practising this half [Shrieks. Running away, he catches her. bour in Mrs. Abigail's wardrobe. (FANTOME
Sir G. Good Mrs. Abigail, not so fast. starts, gives a rap upon his drum ) Pr'ythee,
Abi. Are you alive, Sir ? He has given my don't play the fool. [FANTOME beats.] Nay, shoulder such a cursed tweak! they must be nay, enough of this, good Mr. Fantome. real fingers ; I feel 'em, I'm sure.
Fan. (Aside. ] Death! I'm discovered. This Sir G. What dost thou thiok ? jade Abigail has betrayed me.
Abi. Think, Sir ? think? Troth I don't know Sir G. Mr. Fantome, upon the word of an what to think. Pray, Sir, howastrologer, your thousand pound bribe will Sir G. No questions, good Abigail; thy cu. never gain my lady Truman.
riosity shall be satisfied in due time. Where's Fan. 'Tis plain she has told him all. (Aside. I your lady?
Sir G. Let me advise you to make off as Abi. Oh, I'm so frighted !--and so gladfast as you can, or plainly perceive by my Sir G. Where's your lady I ask you-art, Mr. Ghost will have his bones broke. Abi. Marry, I don't know where I am my.
Fan. [To Sir G.) Look ye, old gentleman, I self-I can't forbear weeping for joyperceive you have learned this "secret from Sir G. Your lady? I say, your lady? I must Mrs. Abigail.
bring you to yourself with one pinch more Sir G. I have learned it from my art.
Abi. Oh! She has been talking a good while Fan. Thy art! pr'ythee no more of that. with the steward. Look ye, I know you are a cheat as much as I Sir G. Then he has opened the whole story am. And if thou'lt keep my counsel, I'll give to her. I'm glad he has prepared her. Oh! thee ten broad pieces.
here she comes. Sir G. I am not mercenary! Young man, I scorn thy gold.
Enter Lady followed by VELLUM. Fan. I'll make them up twenty.
Sir G. Avaunt! and that quickly, or I'll Lady. Where is he ? let me fly into his arms ! raise such an apparition as shall
my lite! my soul! my husband! Fan. An apparition, old gentleman ! you Sir G. Oh! let me catch thee to my heart, mistake your man, I'm not to be frigbtened dearest of women. with bugbears!
Lady. Are you then still alive, and are you Sir G. Let me retire but for a few moments, here! I can scarce believe my seases! Now and I will give thee such a proof of my ait- am 1 happy indeed.
Fan. Why, if thou hast any hocus pocus Sir G. My heart is too full to answer thee. tricks to play, why can'st thou not do them Lady. How could you be so cruel to defer here?
giving me that joy which you knew I must reSir G. The raising of a spirit, requires cer-ceive from your presence? You have robbed tain secret mysteries to be performed, and my life of some hours of happiness that ought words to be muttered in private
to have been in it. Fan. Well, if I see through your trick, will Sir G. It was to make our happiness the you promise to be my friend?
more sincere and unmixed: There will be now Sir G. I will attend and tremble. [Erit. no doubts to dish it. What has been the aftlic
Fan. A very solemn old ass! But I smoke tion of uur lives, has given a variety to them, him-he has a mind to raise his price upon ine. and will hereafier supply us with a thousand I could not think this slut would have used me materials to talk of. thus.- I begin to grow horribly tired of my Lady. I am now satisfied that it is not in the drum. I wish I was well rid of it. However, power of absence to lessen your love towards I have got this by it, that it has driven off Tip-ine. sel for good and all; I sha'n't have the morti. Sir G. And I am satisfied that it is not in fication to see my mistress carried off by such the power of death to destroy that love which a rival. Well, whatever happens, I must stop makes me the happiest of men. this old fellow's mouth. I must not be sparing Lady. Was ever woman so blessed! to find in husb-money. But here he comes.
again the darling of her soul, when she thougbt him lost for ever! to enter into a kind of second marriage with the only man whom she was ever capable of loving!
EPILOGUE. Sir G. May it be as happy as our first, I desire no more! Believe me, my dear, I want TO-NIGHT, the poet's advocate I stand ; words to express those transports of joy and | And he deserves the favour at my hand, tenderness which are every moment rising in | Who in my equipage their cause debating. my heart whilst I speak to thee.
Has placed two lovers, and a third in wait
ing: Enter SERVANTS.
If both the first should from their duty swerve, But. Just as the steward told us, lads! - There's one behind the wainscot in reserve. Look you there, if he ben't with my lady al. In his next play, if I would take this trouble, ready!
He promised me to make the number double : Gard. He, he, he! what a joyful night will In troth 'twas spoke like an obliging creature, this be for Madam.
For though 'tis simple, yet it shows good-naCoach. As I was coming in at the gate, a
ture. strange gentleman whisked by me; but he took My help thus ask'd, I could not choose but to his heels, and made away to the George. If
grant it, I did not see master before me, I should have And really I thought the play would want it, sworn it had been his honour !
Void as it is of all the usual arts Gard. Hast thou given orders for the bells To warm your fancies, and to steal your hearts; to be set a ringing ?
No court-intrigue, por city cuckoldom, Coach. Never trouble thy head about that, No song, no dance, no music- but a drum'tis done,
No smutty thought, in doubtful pbrase ex. Sir G. [TO LADY.] My dear, I long as much
pressed to tell you my whole story, as you do to hear And, gentlemen, if so, pray where's the jest? it. In the mean while I am to look upon this When we would raise your mirth, you hardly as my wedding-day. I'll have nothing but the
know voice of mirth and feasting in my house. My
nd feasting in my house. My | Whether, in strictness, you should laugh or no; poor neighbours and my servants will rejoice But turn upon the ladies in the pit, with me. My hall shall be free to every one,
And if they redden, you are sure 'tis wit. and let my cellars be thrown open.
Protect him then, ye fair ones; for the fair But. Ah! bless your honour; may you never
Of all conditions are his equal care. die again!
He draws a widow, who, ot blameless carriage, Coach. The same good man that ever be True to her jointure, hates a second marriage; was!
And, to improve a virtuous wife's delights, Gard. Whurra!
Out of one man contrives two wedding-nights ; Sir G. Vellum, thou hast done me much Nay, to oblige the sex in every state, service to-day. I know thou lovest Abigail, A nymph of tive and forty finds a mate. but she's disappointed in a fortune. I'll make Too long has marriage, in tbis tasteless it up to both of you, I'll give thee a thousand
age, pound with her. It is not fit there should be With ill-bred raillery supplied the stage: one sad heart in my house to-pight.
No little scribbler is of wit so bare, Lady. What you do for Abigail, I know is But has his fling at the poor wedded pair. meant as a compliment to me. This is a new Our author deals not in conceits so stale: instance of your love.
For, should the examples of his play prevail, Abi. Mr.' Vellum, you are a well-spoken | No man need blush, though true to marriageman : pray do you thank my master and my
Nur be a jest, though he should love bis Sir G. Vellum, I hope you are not displeas
spouse. ed with the gift I make you.
Thus bas he done you British consorts right; Vel. The gift is twofold. I receive from you W bose husbands, should they pry like mine A virtuous partner, and a portion too;
to-night, For which, in humble wise, I thank the Would never find you in your conduct slipping, donors;
[ho-nours. Though they turn'd conjurors to take you trive And so we bid good-night to both your
THE RECRUITING OFFICER:
IN FIVE ACTS,
BY GEORGE FARQUHAR.
FARQUHAR, in his good-humoured dedication of this play · To all friends round the Wrekin,' informs us that it took its rise from some little turns of humour which he met with almost within the shade of that famous hill;' and it bears internal marks of this local and personal origin. It is natural, easy, lively, Rowing; written without any effort, and producing no very great effect at least in the mere perusal. The characters, incidents, dialogue, and grouping are, such as he might very well be supposed to have taken from real life; and to have transferred to the comic stage, with more felicity and fidelity than expense of thought.
The Recruiting Officer is not equal, in the exhibition of wit, invention, or character, to the Beaux' Stratagem; por in the romantic interest of the story, to the Inconstant ; nor in the power of single scenes to the two parts of the Trip to the Jubilee ; but there are sufficient indications of all these excellencies interspersed throughout the streaks and glittering veins of the precious ore every where striking the eye, if not the solid ingots and massy talges of pure gold,
BALANCE, . . . . .
DRURY LANE, 1818.
COVENT GARDEN, 1814
MELINDA, . . . . . .
Mrs. H. Johnston.
Miss Cooke. . . . . . .
| The Grecian council bappily deputes
The sly Ulysses forth-to raise recruits. 'The artful captain found without delay Where great Achilles, a deserter, lay:
Aim fate had ward'd to shun the Trojan blows, sand people may lie in it together and never Him Greece required-against the Trojan feel one another. foes.
Cost. My wife and I would do well to lie All their recruiting arts were needful here, | in't.-But do folk sleep sound in this same To raise this great, this timorous volunteer. bed of honour ? Ulysses well could talk-he stirs, he warms Serg. K. Sound! ay, so sound that they The warlike youth-he listens to the charms never wake. Of plunders, fine laced coats, and glittering Cost. Wauns! I wish again that my wife lay arms.
there. Ulysses caught the young aspiring boy, Serg. K. Say you so ! then I find, brother And listed him who wrought the fate of Troy. Cost. Brother! hold there, friend; I am no Thus by recruiting was bold Hector slain; kindred to you that I know of yet.-- Look ye, Recruiting thus fair Helen did regain, sergeant, no coaxing, no wheedling, d'ye see If for one Helen such prodigious things - if I have a miod to list, why so- if not, why Were acted, that they even listed kings; 'tis not so therefore take your cap and your If for one Helen's artful, vicious charms, brothership back again, for I am not disposed Half the transported world was found in at this present writing.-No coaxing, no arms;
brothering me, faith! What for so many Helens may we dare, | Serg. K. I coax! I wheedle! I'm above it, Whose minds as well as faces are so fair? Sir: I have served twenty campaigns--but, If by one Helen's eyes old Greece could find Sir, you talk well, and I must own that you Its Homer fired to write, even Homer blind; are a man every inch of you; a pretty, young, Then Britons sure beyond compare may sprightly fellow! I love a fellow with a spi. write,
rit; but I scorn to coax ; 'tis base! though I That view so many Helens every night. must say that never in my life have I seen a
man better built. How firm and strong he treads ! he steps like a castle ! but I scorn to wheedle any man—Come, honest lad! will
you take share of a pot? ACT I.
Cost. Nay, for that matter I'll spend my penny with the best he that wears a head, that
is begging yonr pardon, Sir, and in a fair way. SCENE 1.—The Market-Place–Drum beats
Serg. K. Give me your hand then; and now, the Grenadier's march.
gentlemen, I have no more to say than this
here's a purse of gold, and there is a tub of Enter SERGEANT KITE, followed by THOMAS humming ale at my quarters—'tis the king's APPLETREE, COSTAR PEARMAIN, and the Mob. money and the king's drink--he's a generous Serg. K. If any gentlemen, soldiers or others
king and loves his subjects-- 1 hope, gentle
men, you wont refuse the king's health. have a mind to serve his majesty, and pull
AU Mob. No, no, no. down the French king; if any 'prentices have
Serg. K. Hüzza then! huzza for the king severe masters, any children have undutiful
and the honour of Shropshire. parents, if any servants have too little wages,
AU Mob. Huzza! or any husband too much wife, let them repair
Serg. K. Beat Drum. to the noble Sergeant Kite, at the sign of the
(Exeunt shouting, drum beating a Grenadier's Raven, in this good town of Shrewsbury, and
march. they shall receive present relief and enter. tainment. [Drums beat.) Gentlemen, I don't beat my drums here to insnare or inveigle any
Enter CAPTAIN Plume. man; for you must know, Gentlemen, that I am a man of honour : besides, I don't beat up Capt. P. By the grenadier's march that for common soldiers ; no, I list only grena. should be my drum, and by that shout it diers, grenadiers, gentlemen. Pray, gentle should beat with success-Let me see- four men, observe this cap, this is the cap of hon- o'clock-(Looking on his watch.) At ten yesour! it dubs a man a gentleman in the draw. rerday morning I left London-pretty smart ing of a trigger, and he that has the good for. riding, but nothing to the fatigue of recruittune to be born six feet high was born to be a ing. great man-Sir, will you give me leave to try this cap upon your head ?
Enter Kite. Cost. Is there no harm in't? Wont the cap list me?
Serg. K. Welcome to Shrewsbury, noble Serg. K. No, no, no more than I can. Come, captain! from the banks of the Danube to let me see how it becomes you.
| the Severn side, noble captain! you're wel. Cost. Are you sure there be no conjuration come. in it? No gunpowder plot upon me?
i Capt. P. A very elegant reception indeed, Serg. K. No, no, friend; don't fear, man. | Mr. Kite. I find you are fairly entered into
Cost. My mind misgives me plaguily.-Let your recruiting strain-Pray what success ? me see it-[Going to put it on. It smells Serg, K. I've been here a week, and I've rewoundily of sweat and brimstone. Smell, cruited five. Tummas.
Capt. P. Five! pray what are they? Tho. Ay, wauns does it.
Serg. K. I have listed the strong man of Cost. Pray, sergeant, what writing is this Kent, the king of the gipsies, a Scotch pedlar, opop the face of it?
a scoundrel attorney and a Welch parson. Serg. K. The crown, or the bed of honour. Capt. P. An attorney! wert thou mad? list
Cost. Pray now, what may be that same bed a lawyer ! discharge him, discharge him, this of honour?
minute. Serg. K. Oh! a mighty large bed! bigger by Serg. K. Why, Sir ? half than the great bed at Ware-ten thout Capt. P. Because I will have nobody in