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who alone bad more merit than their whole ( was almost full: at the upper end sat Hercuassembly:' upon which he went to the door, les, leaning an arm upon his club; un his right and brongbt in Cato of Utica. That great man hand were Achilles and Ulysses, and between approacbed the company with such an air, that them Æneas; on his left were Hector, showed he contemned the honour which be Theseus, and Jason : the lower end had laid a claim to. Observing the seat opposite to Orpheus, Æsop, Phalaris, and Musæus. The Cæsar was vacaut, he took possession of it, and ushers seemed at a loss for a twelfth man, when, spoke two or three smart sentences upon the methought, to my great joy and surprise, I nature of precedency, which, according to him, heard some at the lower end of the table menconsisted not in place, but in intrinsic merit: tion Isaac Bickerstaff; but those of the upper to which he added, 'that the most virtuous end received it with disdain ; and said, if man, wherever he was seated, was always at they must have a British worthy, they would the upper end of the table.' Socrates, who have Robin Hood.' While I was transported had a great spirit of raillery with his wisdom, with the honour that was done me, and burning could not forbear smiling at a virtue which with envy against my competitor, I was awatook so little pains to make itself agreeable. kened by the noise of the cannon wbich were Cicero took the occasion to make a long disthen fired for the taking of Mons. I should course in praise of Cato, which he uttered with have been very much troubled at being thrown much vebemence. Cæsar answered him with out of so pleasing a vision on any other occaa great deal of seeming temper; but, as I sion ; but thought it an agreeable change, to stood at a great distance from them, I was not have my thoughts diverted from the greatest able to hear one word of what they said. But among the dead and fabulous heroes, to the I could not forbear taking notice, that, in all most famous among the real and the living. the discourse which passed at the table, a word or nod from Homer decided the controversy.
After a short pause, Augustus appeared, No. 82.] Tuesday, October 18, 1709. looking round him with a serene and affable
Ubi idem et maximus et honestissimus amor est, aliquancountenance upon all the writers of bis age,
do įræstat morte jungi, quam vita distrabi. Val. Mar, who strove among themselves which of them should show bim the greatest marks of grati.
Where there is the greatest and most hononrable love, it
is sometimes better to be joined in death, than separater tude and respect. Virgil rose from the table to meet him; and though he was an acceptable guest to all, he appeared more such to
From my own Apartment, October 17. the learned than the military worthies.
AFTER the mind has been employed on conThe next man astonished the whole table templations suitable to its greatness, it is unnawith his appearance. He was slow, solemn, tural to run into sudden mirth or levity; but aud silent in bis behaviour, and wore a raiment we must let the soul subside, as it rose, by curiously wrought with bieroglyphics. As he proper degrees. My late considerations of the came into the middle of the room, he threw ancient heroes impressed a certain gravity upon hack the skirt of it, and discovered a golden my mind, which is much above the little gratithigh. Socrates, at the sight of it, declared fication received from starts of humour and against keeping company with any who were fancy, and threw me into a pleasing sadness. not made of flesh and blood; and, therefore, In this'state of thought I have been looking at desired Diogenes the Laertian to lead him to the fire, and in a pensive manner reflecting the apartment allotted for fabulous herves, and upon the great misfortunes and calamities inciworebies of dubious existence. At his going dent to human life ; among which there are out, he told them, that they did not know none that touch so sensibly as those which whom they dismissed; that be was now Pytha. befall persons who eminently love, and meet goras, the first of philosophers, and that for with fatal interruptions of their happiness merly he had been a very brave man at the when they least expect it. The piety of children siege of Troy.'—'That may be very true,' said to parents, and the affection of parents to Socrates ; ' but you forget that you have like their children, are the effects of instinct; but wise been a very great harlot in your time.' the affection between lovers and friends is This exclusion made way for Archimedes, who founded on reason and choice, which has came forward with a scheme of mathematical always made me think the sorrows of the latfigures in his hand; among which I observed a ter much more to be pitied than those of the cone and a cylinier.
former. The contemplation of distresses of this Seeing this table full, I desired my guide, for sort softens the mind of man, and makes the variety, to lead me to the fabulous apartment, heart better. It extinguishes the seeds of envy the roof of which was painted with Gorgons, and ill-will towards mankind, corrects the pride Chinæras, and Centaurs, with many other of prosperity, and beats down all that fierceness emblematical figures, which I wanted both and insolence which are apt to get into the time and skill to unriddle. The first table ) minds of the daring and fortunate.
For this reason the wise Athenians, in their perfect tranquillity, observing the setting of theatrical performances, laid before the eyes of the sun, the calm face of the deep, and the the people the greatest afflictions which could silent heaving of the waves, which gently rolled befall buman life, and insensibly polished their towards them, and broke at their feet ; when tempers by such representations. Among the at a distance ber kinswoman saw something moderns, indeed, there has arisen a chimerical float on the waters, which she fancied was a method of disposing the fortune of the persons chest; and with a smile told her, ‘she saw it represented, according to what they call poeti- first, and if it came ashore full of jewels, she cal justice; and letting none be unhappy but had a right to it. They both fixed their eyes those who deserve it. In such cases, an intel- upon it, and entertained themselves with the ligent spectator, if he is concerned, knows he subject of the wreck, the cousin still asserting ought not to be so ; and can learn nothing her right; but promising, “if it was a prize, from such a tenderness, but that he is a weak to give her a very rich coral for the child of creature, whose passions cannot follow the dic- which she was then big, provided she might be tates of his understanding. It is very natural, god-mother.' Their unirth soon abated, when when one is got into such a way of thinking, they observed, upon the nearer approach, that to recollect those examples of sorrow which it was a human body. The young lady, who bave made the strongest impression upon our had a heart naturally filled with pity and comimaginations. An instance or two of such you passion, made many melancholy reflections on will give me leave to communicate.
the occasion. 'Who knows,' said she, “but A young gentleman and lady of ancient and this man may be the only hope and heir of a honourable bouses in Coruwall had, from their wealthy house ; the darling of indulgent pachildbood, entertained for each other a gene- rents, who are now in impertinent mirth, and rous and noble passion, which had been long pleasing themselves with the thoughts of offeropposed by their friends, by reason of the ine. ing him a bride they have got ready for bim ? quality of their fortunes ; but their constancy or, may be not be the master of a family that to each other, and obedience to those on whom wholly depended upon his life? There may, for they depended, wrought so much upon their aught we know, be half a dozen fatherless chilrelations, that these celebrated lovers were at dren, anda tender wife, now exposed to poverty length joined in marriage. Soon after their by bis death. What pleasure might he have nuptials, the bridegroom was obliged to go into promised himself in the different welcome be a foreign country, to take care of a considerable was to bave from her and them ! But let us go fortune, which was left him by a relation, and away; it is a dreadful sight! The best office came very opportunely to improve their mode- we can do, is to take care that the poor man, rate circumstances. They received the congra whoever he is, may be decently buried.' She tulations of all the country on this occasion ; turned away, when a wave threw the carcass and I remember it was a common sentence in on the shore. The kinswoman immediately, every one's mouth, “You see how faithful love shrieked out, 'Oh my cousiu !' and fell upon is rewarded.'*
the ground. The unhappy wife went to help He took this agreeable voyage, and sent her friend, when she saw her own husband at home every post fresh accounts of bis success her feet, and dropped in a swoon upon the body. in his affvirs abroail; but at last, though he An old woman, who had been the gentleman's designed to return with the next ship, he la-nurse, came out about this time to call the mented, in his letters, that 'business would ladies in to supper, and found her child, as she detain him some time longer from home,' be always called him, dead on the shore, ber cause he would give himself the pleasure of an mistress and kinswoman boch lying dead by unexpected arrival.
him. Her loud lamentations, and calling her The young lady, after the beat of the day, young master to life, soon awaked the friend walked every evening on the sea-shore, near from ber trance; but the wife was gone for which she lived, with a familiar friend, her ever. busband's kinswoman; and diverted herself When the family and neighbourhood got with what objects they met there, or upon dis-together round the bodies, no one asked any courses of the future methods of life, in the question, but the objects before them told the happy change of their circumstances. They story. stood one evening on the shore together in a Incidents of this nature are the inore moving
when they are drawn ly persons concerned in * This melancholy relation concerning these nish the catastrophe, notwithstanding they are often lovers seems to have been founder on a real stocy, not very oppressed beyond the power of giving them in remote from the original date of the paper. The writer,
a distinct light, except we gather their sorrow whoever he was, affirms that he reineinbered a common sentence in every one's month' on the occasion of the gen- from their inability to speak ir. tleman's succession to an unexpeeter fortune. The reader
I have two original letters, written both on may compare this with Gay's much anired relation of the same day, which are to me exquisite in John liesit and Saba Drew ; ' Pope's Works,' vol. iv. p.9.
their different kinds. The occasion was this :
Lond. Ext. 1770.
vium est, non omuium.
A gentleman who had courted a most agree
SIR, able young woman, and won her heart, oh- T, why two bours ago told you truly I was tained also the consent of ber father, to whom the happiest man alive, am now the most usia she was an only child. The old man had a
serable. Your daughter lies dead at my feet, fancy that they should be married in the same killed by my hand, through a mistake of my church where he himself was, in a village in man's charging my pistols unknown to me. Westmoreland, and made them set out while Him have I murdered for it. Such is my weuhe was laid up with the gout at London. The ding day.--I will immediately follow my wife bridegroom took only his man, the bride her to her grave; but, before I throw myself upon maid : they had the most agreeable journey my sword, I command my distraction so far as imaginable to the place of marriage; from to explain my story to you. I fear my heart whence the bridegroom writ the following letter will not keep together until I have stabbed it. to his wife's father.
Poor, good old man ! -Remember, he that
killed your daughter died for it. Iu the article SIR,
• March 18, 1679.
of death, I give you my thanks, and pray for 'After a very pleasant journey bither, we you, though I dare not for myself. If it be are preparing for the happy hour in which I possible, do not curse me.' am to be your son. I assure you the bride carries it, in the eye of the vicar who married you, mucb beyond her mother; though he No. 83.] Thursday, October 20, 1709. says, your open sleeves, pantaloons, and shoulder-knot, made a much better show than the
Senilis stultitia, quæ deliratio appellari solet, senuin le
M. T. Cic. finical dress I am in. However, I am con
That which is usually called dotage is not the foible of tented to be the second fine man this village
all old men, but only of such as are remarkable for their ever saw, and shall make it very merry before levity and inconstancy. pight, because I shall write myself from thence, * Your most dutiful son,
From my own Apartment, October 19.
T. D. It is my frequeut practice to visit places of 'The bride gives her duty, and is as hand resort in this town where I am least known, to some as an angel.--I am the happiest man observe what reception my works meet with breathing'
in the world, and what good effects I may proThe villagers were assembling about the mise myself from my labours : and it being a church, and the happy couple took a walk in a
privilege asserted by morsieur Montaigne, and private garden. The bridegroom's man knew others of vain-glorious memory, that we wrihis master would leave the place on a sudden
ters of essays may talk of ourselves ; I take the after the wediling, and, seeing him draw his liberty to give an account of the remarks which pistols the night before, took this opportunity
I find are made by some of my gentle readers to go into his chamber and charge them. Upon upon these my dissertations. their return from the garden, they went into
I happened this evening tu fall into a coffee.
house near the Exchange, where two persons that room ; and, after a little fond raillery on the subject of their courtship, the lover took up
were reading my account of the · Table of
Fame.' a pistol, which he knew he had unloaded the night before, and, presenting it to her, said, with
The one of these was commenting as he read, the most graceful air, whilst she looked pleased and explaining who was meant by this and the at his agreeable flattery ; ' Now, madam, re
1 observed the
other worthy as he passed on. pent of all those cruelties you have been guilty person over-against him wonderfully intent and of to me; consider, before you die, how often satisfied with his explanation. When he cane you have made a poor wretch freeze under your conductor to the table ; 'No, no,' sail he,
to Julius Cæsar, who is said to have refused any casement; you shall die, you tyrant, you shall die, with all those instruments of death and
he is in the right of it, he bas money enough destruction about you, with that enchanting to be welcome wherever he comes ;' and then smile, those killing ringlets of your hair - whispered, he means a certain colonel of the * Give fire !' said she, laughing. He did so;
train-bands. Upon realing that Aristotle and shot her dead. Who can speak his condi? made his claim with some rudeness, but great tion ? but he bore it so patiently as to call up rough and so reasonable? It must be some
strength of reason; Who can that be, so bis man. The poor wretch entered, and his master locked the door upon bim.Will,' whig, I warrant you. There is nothing but said be, did you charge these pistols ?' He an. party in these public papers.' Where Pythaswered, 'Yes.' Upon which he shot him dead goras is said to have a golden thigh, 'Ay, ay,' with that remaining. After this, amidst a thou- said he, he has money enough in his breeches; sand broken sobs, piercing groans, and dis- that is the allerman of our ward,' you must tracted motions, he writ the following letter to the father of his dead mistress.
* Tatler, No.81.
know. Whatever he read, I found he inter. 1' The fair one understands love better than I preted from his own way of life and acquaint. astronomy?' I am sure, witbout the help of ance. I am glad my readers can construe for that art, this poor meagre trunk of mine is a themselves these difficult points; but, for the very ill habitation for luve. She is pleased to benefit of posterity, I design, when I come to speak civilly of my sense, but Ingenium male write my last paper of this kind, to make it an habitat is an invincible difficulty in cases of this explanation of all my former. In that piece, nature. I had always, indeed, from a passion you shall have all I have commended, with their to please the eyes of the fair, a great pleasure proper names. The faulty characters must be in dress. Add to this, that I have writ songs left as they are, because we live in an age since I was sixty, and have lived with all the wherein vice is very general, and virtue very circumspection of an old beau, as I am, But particular; for which reason the latter only my friend Horace has very well said, ' Every wants explanation.
year takes something from us ; and instructed But I must turn my present discourse to what me to form my pursuits and desires according is of yet greater regard to me than the care of to the stage of my life : therefore, I have no iny writings; that is to say, the preservation more to value myself upun, than that I can of a lady's heart. Little did I think I should converse with young people without peevishness, ever have business of this kind on my hands or wishing myself a moment younger. For more; but, as little as any one who knows me which reason, when I am amongst them, I would believe it, there is a lady at this time rather moderate than interrupt their diverwho professes love to me. Her passion and sions. But though I have this complacency, I good humour you shall have in her own words. must not pretend to write to a lady civil things, *MR. BICKERSTAFF,
as Maria desires. Tine was, when I could *I had formerly a very good opinion of my, her fair hands; and, that if this paper trembler
have told her, “I had received a letter from self; but it is now withdrawn, and I have placed it upon you, Mr. Bickerstaff, for whom I am
as she read it, it then best expressed its author,' not ashamed to declare I have a very great pas.
or some other gay conceit. Though I never sion and tenderness. It is not for your face,
saw her, I could have told her. 'that good for that I never saw : your shape and height i sense and good humour smiled in her eyes : am equally a stranger to ; but your understand-) that constancy and good-nature dwelt in her ing charms me, and I am lost if you do not disa heart : that beauty and good breeding appeared semble a little love for me. I am not without
in all her actions. When I was five-and-twenhopes ; because I am not like the tawdry gay y, upon sight of one syllable, even wrong spelt, things that are fit only to make bone lace. 1 by a lady I never I saw, I could tell her, that am neither childish-young, nor beldam-old,
her height was that which was fit for inviting but, the world says, a good agreeable woman.
our approach, and commanding our respect ; Speak peace to a troubled heart, troubled
that a smile sat on her lips, which prefaced her only for you; and in your next paper let me
expressions before she uttered them, and her find your thoughts of me.
aspect prevented her speech. All she could 'Do not think of finding out who I am, for, say, though she had an infinite deal of wit, was notwithstanding your interest in dæmons, they form; her form! which struck her beholders
but a repetition of what was expressed by ber cannot belp you either to my name, or a sight of with ideas more moving and forcible than ever my face; therefore, do not let them deceive you. were inspired by music, painting, or eloquence.
'I can bear no discourse, if you are not the subject; and, believe me, I know more of love At this rate I panted in those days ; but, ah ! than you do of astronomy.
sixty-three! I am very sorry I can only return Pray, say sume civil things in return to
tbe agreeable Maria a passion expressed rather my generosity, and you shall have my very best from the head than the heart. pen employed to thank you, and I will confirm
"DEAR MADAM, it. 'I am your admirer,
'You have already seen the best of me, and • MARIA.'
I so passionately love you, that I desire we may There is something wonderfully pleasing in never meet. If you will examine your beart, the favour of women ; and this letter has put you will find that you join the man with the me in so good a humour, that nothing could ) philosopher: and if you bave that kind opinion displease me since I received it. My boy breaks of my sense as you pretend, I question not but glasses and pipes; and instead of giving bin a you add to it complexion, air, and shape: but, knock on the pate, as my way is, for I hate dear Molly, a man in his grand climacteric is scolding at servants, I only say, “Ab, Jack! of no sex. Be a good girl; and conduct your. thou hast a head, and so has a pin,' or some self with honour and virtue, when you love one such merry expression. But, alas! how am Iyounger than myself, I am with the greatest mortified when be is putting on my fourth pair tenderness, Your innocent lover, of stockings on these poor spindles of mine ?
• 1, B.
Wills's Coffee-house, October 19. rape is to be tried. But by Mr. A. B.'s favour, There is nothing more common than the I cannot tell who are so much concerned in weakness mentioned in the following epistle; that part of the law as the sex he mentious, and I believe there is hardly a man living wbó they being the only persons liable to such inwas not been more or less injured by it.
sults. Nor, indeed, do I think it more un
reasonable that they should be inquisitive on *SIR, • Land's-End, October 12.
such occasions than men of honour, when oik *I have left the town some time; and much is tried for killing another in a duel. It is the sooner, for not having bad the advantage, very natural to enquire bow the fatal pass was when I lived there, of so good a pilot as you made, that we may the better defend ourselves are to this present age. Your cautions to the when we come to be attacked. Several eminen young men against the vices of the town are
ladies appeared lately at the court of justice on very well : but there is one not less needful, such an occasion, and, with great patience and which I think you have omitted. I had from attention, staid the whole trials of two persons the Rough Diamond (a gentleman so called for the above-said crime. The law to me, infrom an honest blunt wit he had) not long deed, seems a little defective in this point; and since dead, this observativn, That a young man must be at least three or four years in London wbich is committed by men only, should have
it is a very great hardship, that this crime, before he dares say, No.
men only on their jury. I bumbly, therefore, • You will easily see the truth and force of propose, that on future trials of this sort, balf this observation; for I believe more people are of the twelve may be women ; and those such drawn away against their inclinations, than whose faces are well known to have taken with tbem. A young man is afraid to deny notes, or may be supposed to remember what any body going to a tavern to dinner ; or, after happened in former trials in the same place. being gorged there, to repeat the same with There is the learned Androgyne, that would apotber company at supper, or to drink exces.
make a good fore-woman of the pannel, who, sively, if desired, or go to any other place, or by luug attendance, understands as much law commit any other extravagancy proposed. The and anatomy as is necessary in this case. Until fear of being thought covetous, to have no mo
this is taken care of, I am humbly of opinion, ney, or to be under the dominion or fear of his it would be much more expedient that the fair parents and friends, binder him from the free
were wholly absent; for to what end can it be exercise of bis understanding, and affirming that they should be present at such examinaboldly the true reason, which is, his real dislike tions, when they can only be perplexed with a of what is desired. If you could cure this slavish fellow-feeling for the injured, without any facility, it would save abundance at their first power to avenge their sufferings? It is an unentrance into the world. 'I am, sir, Yours,
necessary pain which the fair ones give them• SOLOMON AFTERWIT.'
selves on these occasions. I have known a This epistle bas given an occasion to a trea young woman sbriek out at some parts of the tise on this subject, wherein I shall lay down evidence; and have frequently observed, that rules when a young stripling is to say, No; and when the proof grew particular and strong, a young virgin, Yes.
there has been such a universal flutter of fans, N. B. For the publication of this discourse, Ithat one would think the whole female audience wait only for subscriptions from the under gra- were falling into fits. Nor, indeed, can I see duates of each university, and the young ladies how men themselves can be wholly unmoved in the boarding schools of Hackney and Chelsea, at such tragical relations.
In short, I must tell my female readers, and St. James's Coffce-house, October 19. they may take an old man's word for it, that Letters from the Hague, of the twenty-fifth there is nothing in woman so graceful and be of October, N. S. advise, that the garrison of coming as modesty. It adds charms to their Mons marched out on the twenty-third instant, beauty, and gives a new softness to their sex. and a garrison of the allies marched into the Without it, simplicity and innocence appear town. All the forces in the field, both of the rude; reading and good sense, masculine; wit enemy and the confederates, are preparing to and humour, lascivious. This is so necessary a withdraw into winter-quarters.
qualification for pleasing, that the loose part of womankind, whose study it is to ensnare men's
hearts, never fail to support the appearance of No. 84.] Saturday, October 24, 1709. what they know is so essential to that end;
and I have heard it reported by the young From my own Apartmenl, October 21.
fellows in my time, as a maxim of the cele. I have received a letter subscribed A. B. brated madam Bennet,* that a young wench, wherein it bas been represented to me as an mnormity, that there are more than crdinary
* A mitorions bawd in the reign of Charles II. called crowds of women at the Old Bailey when a
Vstress, and lautan mud Mother Berluel,